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Prime
10-22-2005, 06:45 PM
It's just a simple question that I've been wanting to ask for awhile now. How come I feel like I'm in a corner all by myself on here? I go through that at school and at chruch, and I didn't expect that I had to go through it here too. Do some of you just just don't like or something? I mean I give my imput about alot of things, but some of you just tend to move on and talk with others. I don't really understand this.

R_t_Kraken
10-22-2005, 06:55 PM
I'm sure everybody on here feels like that on here sometimes Ace. I know I do.

I've also noticed that here in the lounge there seems to be a small gathering of people, you're either a part of that or your not. If your not, you'll be treated as such.

But why let it bother you? I don't. If someone doesn't like you, F em.

darkmistress
10-22-2005, 06:56 PM
It's just a simple question that I've been wanting to ask for awhile now. How come I feel like I'm in a corner all by myself on here? I go through that at school and at chruch, and I didn't expect that I had to go through it here too. Do some of you just just don't like or something? I mean I give my imput about alot of things, but some of you just tend to move on and talk with others. I don't really understand this.

Dude don't worry about it ;) If people have something against you that's their own problem and something they should seriously deal with themselves. If they want to be arses then quite frankly they are not worth conversing with...

FinHeathen
10-22-2005, 06:58 PM
Would you like a hug?

It'll Happen11
10-22-2005, 07:11 PM
Would you like a hug?

:lol:

cnc66
10-22-2005, 07:12 PM
hmmm, I've never noticed that Ace. You have had a pouty attitude lately but i figured the stresses of being young and uncertain. Lighten up on yourself, you have a bright future, even if you do not yet see it for yourself. Remember this... no-one can do anything to you, they can't make you happy, sad, angry or anything, until you let them. Most people are happy or sad because they choose it. Simply chose not to be sad or whatever. If interaction here has become less interesting find other things to occupy yourself. I read and study history, find your own thing but improve yourself. Read everything, engage in worthwhile projects, help a friend, or make a new one. Nothing will get you out of yourself as quickly as helping someone else, nothing. It has value to both parties beyond the act itself. Keep your chin up, there are others out there that understand the feeling, I learned to work on me.

Prime
10-22-2005, 07:16 PM
hmmm, I've never noticed that Ace. You have had a pouty attitude lately but i figured the stresses of being young and uncertain. Lighten up on yourself, you have a bright future, even if you do not yet see it for yourself. Remember this... no-one can do anything to you, they can't make you happy, sad, angry or anything, until you let them. Most people are happy or sad because they choose it. Simply chose not to be sad or whatever. If interaction here has become less interesting find other things to occupy yourself. I read and study history, find your own thing but improve yourself. Read everything, engage in worthwhile projects, help a friend, or make a new one. Nothing will get you out of yourself as quickly as helping someone else, nothing. It has value to both parties beyond the act itself. Keep your chin up, there are others out there that understand the feeling, I learned to work on me.


Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.

FinHeathen
10-22-2005, 07:22 PM
Man I have been in a sad moos for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.

Alright, here's some real-arse advice. My little sister died of brain cancer when she was 13 and I was 14. It sucked the big balls, and messed me up right good. After the hormonal years of my youth passed, I ended up beign just a regular dude, but perhaps a little too moody.. and sheet. (I'm not good at making points sometimes.)

Anyway, after a point, after being fed up with the state of the world and all the grand machinations of life which I have no control over, I simply just chilled. Chilled the funk out. Turned me in to an incorrigable smartass, as The Mor or The Warp will testify to, but I just decided that as bad as stuff is, you handle one thing at a time, and rest well knowing that you're better than everyone (even if it isn't true.). Just find something that makes you laugh and frickin do it man. I do it everyday. Sometimes other people disagree with what I think is funny, but then, I find that funny too.

Also, drinking helps.

R_t_Kraken
10-22-2005, 07:30 PM
Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before.

I sure hope you're not serious. I can't stand when people threaten suicide. It's nothing more than a cry for attention. The selfishness one would have to have for it to even cross thier mind. Imagine what your family and friends would go through. Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.
If you truly feel you're depressed, or have any kind of chemical imbalance, then tell your parents, and have them get you help.

I saw a shrink for 2 years, and have taken perscription anti-depression, and social anxiety drugs, from Zoloft, to Celexa, to Paxil. I was on perscription meds for 2 years. And for me, the only way I feel I can be happy is to do it myself. I've stopped taking meds for over a year now, and although I still get feelings of anger and depression from time to time, even for no reason a all. But i'd rather that than be somebody i'm not. Some people's depression is so severe that they contemplate weather or not suicide is the answer. Some people will even go as far to commit violent crimes on others. If this sounds like you, get help. It's nothing to be ashamed of man.

cnc66
10-22-2005, 07:43 PM
Man I have been in a sad moos for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.

Adjust your attitude towards yourself and the others won't be nearly so important...or bothersome. Learning to become comfortable in your own skin is one of toughest of all battles, at least it has been mine. I have many boogiemen, I think maybe we all do in one form or another. I can be in a room full of people I know and be so lonely my insides are twisted and I feel like that silent scream face. My solution to your problem was to drink and drug for many years and a fairly accurate version of my story can be found in almost any recovery room. My solution to me is to help others in the community, it gives me a sense of worth and satisfaction, it helps me to like me despite me. Take right now for instance. Ever since I read your post my entire focus has been what might i say to help this young man. For a few minutes I completly forgot about the hurricane that is coming and the associated decisions I must make tomorrow so for that thanks, you have helped me and given this evening some worth.

Buddwalk
10-22-2005, 07:45 PM
Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.


Thoughts of suicide has crossed i think every teenagers mind even myself. I have no problem with you and nobody else should either. At times you were kinda of eh a prick i should say. But so am I at times and so is 95% of every finheaven member, including lounge only posters. Dont feel like your in a corner man, just come on here and have fun :D

Prime
10-22-2005, 08:00 PM
Adjust your attitude towards yourself and the others won't be nearly so important...or bothersome. Learning to become comfortable in your own skin is one of toughest of all battles, at least it has been mine. I have many boogiemen, I think maybe we all do in one form or another. I can be in a room full of people I know and be so lonely my insides are twisted and I feel like that silent scream face. My solution to your problem was to drink and drug for many years and a fairly accurate version of my story can be found in almost any recovery room. My solution to me is to help others in the community, it gives me a sense of worth and satisfaction, it helps me to like me despite me. Take right now for instance. Ever since I read your post my entire focus has been what might i say to help this young man. For a few minutes I completly forgot about the hurricane that is coming and the associated decisions I must make tomorrow so for that thanks, you have helped me and given this evening some worth.



Thanks for being concerned about my problems man. I will use that as a motivation towards my problems. Once again, thanks. I have always respect you cnc66, and I will continue to do so.

Quelonio
10-22-2005, 08:01 PM
Life is easier than we all think it is, and I am saying this while in the middle of huge pressure and depression (my girl lives in another country, and I am about to shoot my thesis) but sometimes just allowing yourself to have fun is all you need to move on. Sometimes it isn't and then is a good time to go for help, I did therapoy for a year and a half, and Effexor XR for 9 months, it does not save you, it just calms you down, it allows you to think with a straight head, and not make important life decisitions when your mind is all clutered up.

This is going to sound weird in a way (since I know that americans, and mostly american males are not very open to this kind of thing) but think of it, you've been here for a year and eight months, you have more than 8,000 posts, people here love you dude, we might have started out just as people who have one thing in common (the dolphins) but we sure as hell have found out that it is well beyond that, we are creating community, and for that to be so efective it is only because to a certain extent, one that maybe we are never going to actually aknowledge, we just love each other. It is not LOVe love, but it is what we mexicans call querer, that is I appreciate you,and if you dissappear from here I would wonder where the heck have you been, as I would wonder about other guys, because i care about them.

Anyways, i better stop, now. People are going to think I'm gay, not that there is anything wrong with it.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 08:06 PM
Bro you are not the first member of the family to bring this up. Keep the faith and hang in there. I enjoy your posts, and I am glad you are a family member of Finheaven. Any time you need, or want to talk I am here.:)

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 08:07 PM
One Cleo supporter to another, cheers!;)

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 08:09 PM
hmmm, I've never noticed that Ace. You have had a pouty attitude lately but i figured the stresses of being young and uncertain. Lighten up on yourself, you have a bright future, even if you do not yet see it for yourself. Remember this... no-one can do anything to you, they can't make you happy, sad, angry or anything, until you let them. Most people are happy or sad because they choose it. Simply chose not to be sad or whatever. If interaction here has become less interesting find other things to occupy yourself. I read and study history, find your own thing but improve yourself. Read everything, engage in worthwhile projects, help a friend, or make a new one. Nothing will get you out of yourself as quickly as helping someone else, nothing. It has value to both parties beyond the act itself. Keep your chin up, there are others out there that understand the feeling, I learned to work on me.Great post bro!;)

Buddwalk
10-22-2005, 08:11 PM
One Cleo supporter to another, cheers!;)

After what i've read on the guy more than anything Hes like a Tony Banks type qb...except faster with a weaker arm :rolleyes:

NaboCane
10-22-2005, 08:27 PM
Ace, you have to know that while we each live within ourselves, with all the isolation of emotion that that entails, others also live in their own world. Most people ignore each other not out of any animosity or lack of caring, but just from the hecticness of our daily existences.

When you're in the working world you'll be more able to appreciate what I mean; for instance, I have friends here in Seattle that I haven't seen in over a year. They're dear friends, and my girl and I love them and appreciate them. Yet here we are, involved in our own daily scurrying about, and a year has passed since we last saw them. Crazy, isn't it? Yet there it is. Should we make time to see them? Of course. Do we? Something always seems to get in the way.

Same here on the board. We all have posters we like better than others; we see their posts, and we read them, but 90% of the time we don't necessarily respond. Doesn't mean we don't think of it, but sometimes it's lack of time, or not having anything pertinent to add to the conversation. But it doesn't mean we don't still think the same of that poster.

I think of you as one of the good things at FinHeaven, one of the mainstays; if you didn't post anymore, I would miss you. I like reading you, the way I like reading a lot of other posters here whom I don't know very well or have a lot of interaction with, yet like nonetheless.

Also, I - and a lot of others on this board - need to be aware of how our actions affect others. Sometimes we get caught up in cliques, or conversations, that are by nature exclusionary. A good example is the 3am crew. I'm sure that it didn't start out as being soemthing that was meant to make anyone feel excluded or not wanted - but by its very nature (the time at which it takes place) alone I think it ends up being exclusionary to an extent. The "Warriors" theme takes it a step further, as by its nature only a certain number of posters can participate.

So to partially remedy this, I offer you my place as Vermin on the crew. Take the badge as your own, and join in on the fun and merriment - I feel certain that the rest of the crew aren't going to have any problem with it, and they'll be glad to include you. I'll still be around occassionaly, but my work is taking me more and more to a day schedule, so I wouldn't be able to honor my commitment to the crew anyway. Just watch out for Gonzo, he's trouble.

But I urge you also to try to get out of yourself, and find activities with other people - things that even might seem silly or a waste of time now, but if you get involved you will find yourself enjoying, like groups at school or church, or maybe a local rec center. Talk to your parents or your minister about this, and get their feedback.

But whatever you do, don't let your sense of self-worth, your sense of self, be reliant on a bunch of nameless, faceless people on here that you've never met. Go out and do real things, with real people, and live for real. And I hope you can tell the difference between good advice (like cnc says, READ!) and bad (drinking helps...:shakeno: ) and choose wisely.

And if you want to vent to us faceless souls, by all means, that's what this forum is for. Just get out and live as well.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 08:36 PM
After what i've read on the guy more than anything Hes like a Tony Banks type qb...except faster with a weaker arm :rolleyes:Bro he has a strong arm!:)

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 08:41 PM
Keep your chin up, keep smiling, and enjoy life! Don't let things get you down. Do like I do. I may have the worst day in heck the day before, but that next morning when my feet hit the ground it's a new day all over again!;)

NJFINSFAN1
10-22-2005, 08:50 PM
Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.

I have two brother-in-laws that did commit suicide. They thought it would be best for everyone. But let me tell you, it really screwed up everyone!:eek:

My wife crys at least one a week because of this, everytime she sees or hears something that reminds her of them.

Get help, its better for you and your family!

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 08:56 PM
Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.Bro I want you around, and want to see and read your posts! Please don't even think of that, if you need someone to reach out to, please pm me anytime, or email me at jsfoy@sbcglobal.net Ace I am hear to listen any time, and if you want I will even give you my home phone, and cell phone number. Hang in there brother, life will get better I promise. Please do not do anything to hurt yourself, we are all here for you, and appreciate you as a dear family member. We would defintely be lost without you.;)

cnc66
10-22-2005, 09:03 PM
something cool that applies; http://spikedhumor.com/articles/3629/Two_Legged_Dog.html

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 09:15 PM
Would you like a hug?Lend support to a brother don't be a putz.

poisonphin
10-22-2005, 09:29 PM
Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.Seriosly don't kill yourself. That is one of the biggest mistakes anyone could make. If need be, medication could be a good option to take.

backpacker
10-22-2005, 09:42 PM
Many teenagers feel like the world is coming down on them, like everyone is out to ruin his/her life. I know what you mean, lately everything just keeps ****ing up for me. But the next day, I forget about it, relax, and just go on with my life. While that may not seem smart to keep putting off your problems, but its my way of dealing with things and it works for me. I extremely believe in the saying "When something bad happens, only good can follow", and you should too.

Jt0323
10-22-2005, 10:03 PM
Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.

my friend took his life last year and i just felt pissed, i was very upset but keep thinking why would he do this, to make a statement? its just not worth it, ur 16 man u got ur whole life ahead of u, just think in 2 years ull be out of school and in college, dont look back look ahead. If ppl dont like u then screw them, its their problem

FIN-IN-RI
10-22-2005, 10:20 PM
You sound like your in a deep hole man..just don't think that you'll magically come out of it if you continue to ignore the root of your problem.

From what I can see this has nothing to do with the mb persay, it has more to do with how you consider yourself. You're thinking too much and reading into things too much.

We can all sit here and tell you the right thing to do which is to just live your life and love yourself but until you confront your depression and/or anxiety it will consume you.

You dont want it to consume you man.. you have to be strong and fight within yourself.. fight the bad and negative thoughts. Be strong, man.. be tough.. just fight it within yourself.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 10:26 PM
Ace as you can see the family cares about you, respects you, and wants you around. Talk to us bro, we are here for you! We are here for you now, and always will!:)

Gonzo
10-22-2005, 10:26 PM
I'm not really good at giving advice and whatnot like cnc and the others are. But if you ever just wanna talk, feel free to PM me anytime or IM me on the ones I made available. I am sure you can do that with anyone on here.

I know I tend to talk to what could seem like a select few. It really has nothing to do with any ill will towards anyone else. Usually its nothing more than being on at the same time or common interest topics (i.e. movies for me). I imagine thats how it is for most on here.

Take care!

FIN-IN-RI
10-22-2005, 10:26 PM
It's just a simple question that I've been wanting to ask for awhile now. How come I feel like I'm in a corner all by myself on here? I go through that at school and at chruch, and I didn't expect that I had to go through it here too. Do some of you just just don't like or something? I mean I give my imput about alot of things, but some of you just tend to move on and talk with others. I don't really understand this.

You say that you feel like you are in a corner all by yourself wherever you go..

Doesn't that telll you something?

You feel like you're in a corner everywhere you go. No one is putting you there but yourself.

Fight yourself to think positive and more easy, light-hearted. the more you fight the more things will change around you. People can sense pessimism, hoplessness, optimism and confidence. People sense it and react on it. Think about it.

FIN-IN-RI
10-22-2005, 10:31 PM
Adjust your attitude towards yourself and the others won't be nearly so important...or bothersome. Learning to become comfortable in your own skin is one of toughest of all battles, at least it has been mine. I have many boogiemen, I think maybe we all do in one form or another. I can be in a room full of people I know and be so lonely my insides are twisted and I feel like that silent scream face. My solution to your problem was to drink and drug for many years and a fairly accurate version of my story can be found in almost any recovery room. My solution to me is to help others in the community, it gives me a sense of worth and satisfaction, it helps me to like me despite me. Take right now for instance. Ever since I read your post my entire focus has been what might i say to help this young man. For a few minutes I completly forgot about the hurricane that is coming and the associated decisions I must make tomorrow so for that thanks, you have helped me and given this evening some worth.

yeah man.. good post.

Wildbill3
10-22-2005, 10:37 PM
I'll echo the sentiments that others already have, and that is that everyone goes through what you are talking about in here, and that this too shall pass. My concern is, have you talked with your parents about this? Any friends? who else have you reached out to? At 16 with changing hormones, you problem may be more than you can handle on your own, and there is no shame in that. You have to understand that your problem probably isn't your fault, and depending on how it onsets, it may be something that requires medication.

You are not alone, no matter what you think.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 10:39 PM
I'll echo the sentiments that others already have, and that is that everyone goes through what you are talking about in here, and that this too shall pass. My concern is, have you talked with your parents about this? Any friends? who else have you reached out to? At 16 with changing hormones, you problem may be more than you can handle on your own, and there is no shame in that. You have to understand that your problem probably isn't your fault, and depending on how it onsets, it may be something that requires medication.

You are not alone, no matter what you think.Way to go Semper Fi!:beerbang:

DOLFANMIKE
10-22-2005, 10:43 PM
Man I have been in a sad mood for about 2 months or so. I haven't told anybody this, but killing myself has crossed my mind before. I have been tyring to adjust my attitude towards different people, but I can't seem to be able to do that.

Ace,

The next time you go to school, you really need to share how you are feeling with your favorite teacher. If you don't have a favorite, then pick the nicest one. Even if they have rough edges don't let that stop you. Go to them and tell them exactly how you feel. They will be able to help you down this path and help you find some solutions to your depression.

If you don't want to talk to your teachers, go to the school nurse, or a counselor. Please do this...it will help. I've worked with students for many years and what you are going through is not at all unusual. Many students in today's society are struggling too.

D-Mike

Prime
10-22-2005, 10:46 PM
WOW!


I didn't realize on much some of you guys actually know what I am feeling. I have to admire you all for giving me so many imputs and opinion about what I should do. I believe that you guys have made me gain some convidence in myself to become who I really am. I believe that talking to you guys have really helped me out and I didn't know where I would be without ya all. So once again, thanks all. This will be a batlte that I will keep on going through, but I will always look at this thread again and again.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 10:52 PM
WOW!


I didn't realize on much some of you guys actually know what I am feeling. I have to admire you all for giving me so many imputs and opinion about what I should do. I believe that you guys have made me gain some convidence in myself to become who I really am. I believe that talking to you guys have really helped me out and I didn't know where I would be without ya all. So once again, thanks all. This will be a batlte that I will keep on going through, but I will always look at this thread again and again.Ace as I told you in the pm, I will always be an ear for you, if you need someone to listen. Life is full of great things, we just have to work through the challenges brother! You have a family here that not only cares, but is here for a brother when he is down. Keep the faith, and as cnc66 says, keep your chin up bro!:)

Wildbill3
10-22-2005, 10:57 PM
I'm glad its helping Ace, but I want you to talk to someone tonight about this, don't delay, okay man?
WOW!


I didn't realize on much some of you guys actually know what I am feeling. I have to admire you all for giving me so many imputs and opinion about what I should do. I believe that you guys have made me gain some convidence in myself to become who I really am. I believe that talking to you guys have really helped me out and I didn't know where I would be without ya all. So once again, thanks all. This will be a batlte that I will keep on going through, but I will always look at this thread again and again.

Prime
10-22-2005, 10:58 PM
I'm glad its helping Ace, but I want you to talk to someone tonight about this, don't delay, okay man?


I won't man...I won't. Mostly though, I need to try to help myself as much as I can.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 11:00 PM
I won't man...I won't. Mostly though, I need to try to help myself as much as I can.If you need family to lend a hand we are here for support.:)

miamikid92
10-22-2005, 11:01 PM
If you need family to lend a hand we are here for support.:)yeah me too.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-22-2005, 11:02 PM
yeah me too.Thanks Buddy!:)

MNFINFAN
10-22-2005, 11:24 PM
WOW!


I didn't realize on much some of you guys actually know what I am feeling. I have to admire you all for giving me so many imputs and opinion about what I should do. I believe that you guys have made me gain some convidence in myself to become who I really am. I believe that talking to you guys have really helped me out and I didn't know where I would be without ya all. So once again, thanks all. This will be a batlte that I will keep on going through, but I will always look at this thread again and again.
Ace man, we all have been through what you are going through, however alone you might feel you are you are not. When I was 19 I honestly believed I would not live to be 21, I was out of control and knew that I was never going anywhere. But I got the right help, talked to my parents found out that what I was experiencing was normal, backed off the booze etc, now I am 38, father of 3 awesome boys, owned a couple of businesses, failed in a couple too, but life goes on, every day is a learning experience. Being happy isn't easy, you have to ignore the chatter and the doubters, it is hard work but once you succeed in your goal, you will realise what you can do and that will open your eyes to even greater things.

Make a goal for yourself, do a weekly, year, three year, personal goal, aim high and work hard and you will find that all this crap will be a speck on a fly's arse.

You obviously contribute more than you think, you have been here for 18 months and have over 8K posts, wow, I have been here since 2002 and lag way behind. Keep contributing, get help, talk to people in your life that can help, set goals, work hard to get them and life will be your reward.

Cheers

Paul

King Nate
10-22-2005, 11:26 PM
If you need family to lend a hand we are here for support.:)

Damn straight, FFIC.

Ace, we're here for you buddy. Never do anything rash because things are bad at this moment. Soon enough you'll be looking back and laughing at ever feeling this way.

Jt0323
10-22-2005, 11:36 PM
WOW!


I didn't realize on much some of you guys actually know what I am feeling. I have to admire you all for giving me so many imputs and opinion about what I should do. I believe that you guys have made me gain some convidence in myself to become who I really am. I believe that talking to you guys have really helped me out and I didn't know where I would be without ya all. So once again, thanks all. This will be a batlte that I will keep on going through, but I will always look at this thread again and again.

glad u feel better, we all care about u man!

Phinz1972
10-23-2005, 12:00 AM
It's just a simple question that I've been wanting to ask for awhile now. How come I feel like I'm in a corner all by myself on here? I go through that at school and at chruch, and I didn't expect that I had to go through it here too. Do some of you just just don't like or something? I mean I give my imput about alot of things, but some of you just tend to move on and talk with others. I don't really understand this.

Ace,

Before anything, I want to apologize if it has ever seemed like I was ignoring you or your post, when I get onto finheaven, I usually breeze through stuff and some post stick out to me and I respond to them, it's not that I don't read your post/threads or anything like that, but my computer time is split into many catagories with doing work and such. As for this in the corner feeling, I've been there a few times man, it's a tough thing to go through, but you'll get through it man. I went through it when my stepfather passed, when I got sentenced to serve seventeen months, when I realized my mother's illness was really taken it's toll, etc... but what you need to do is find something that helps you escape from that feeling and everything. I took on drawing, webdesign, software creation, and tattoo designs and eventually got my tattoo licenses. You have my yahoo name, so if you ever need to talk about anything, you can always lean on me no matter what the situation man. If you want, maybe blogging will help you release those feelings that you've seemed to keep bottled up, if so, I will set up a nice wordpress mysql powered blog on my server and make it ad free for you. If you ever want to kick a game of madden online or want to help me arrange some stuff or anything, let me know man, I'll be here for you. If need be, can PM you my home number, my cell number, email address, home address, etc... whatever will help you man, just let me know.

Regards,
Kevin

RWhitney014
10-23-2005, 12:10 AM
Ace, don't suppress your emotions. When you feel like laughing, laugh. When you feel like crying, cry. When you feel like being alone to introspect, go somewhere comfortable where you can relax and introspect. We're a similar age, and I can tell you that you are probably overwhelmed with unimportant things.

I used to get so pissed off about minor things. For example, for the longest time I didn't want to drive because I was afraid I'd get into an accident. Well, I got my permit and got a brand new car and was going for my license in a week when I went driving without my parents for the first time. I was with my brother, who's 22, and his girlfriend, and we were going to the beach. On the way back into town, I was sitting at a red light at a drawbridge that was going up when someone in a huge van rear-ended and totaled my car. I was in shock...brand new car filled with broken glass when I was doing nothing wrong, almost teetering on the edge of the intracoastal. I was scared out of my mind. I realized something that night...I had done nothing wrong. Why was this going to get me to stop living? I got my license that week, got another car via insurance, and I drive everyday now.

You'll live and learn. Surround yourself with people who support you. Don't try to be popular or cool...your real friends will be turned off and you won't have anyone to turn to. Be yourself and understand that there's always a high road available for you to take. Appreciate natural wonders: watch the sun rise or set, enjoy autumn air, engage in activities that make you happy. Just tonight I hung out with friends to play a video game that we absolutely love...everyone else who never plays with us thinks we're dorks for doing it every weekend, but we love it and we don't care what they think.

And as Bill said, absolutely do NOT use reactions or lack thereof of people on a message board as an odometer for how people feel about you. There are millions of posts on this site...no one can keep track of all of them, especially with that Lemon next to everyone's posts.

finsmx
10-23-2005, 12:16 AM
hey man Ace come on man just like fin fan in cali says we're all a big family hang in there dude :up:

jtoomuch
10-23-2005, 12:29 AM
It's just a simple question that I've been wanting to ask for awhile now. How come I feel like I'm in a corner all by myself on here? I go through that at school and at chruch, and I didn't expect that I had to go through it here too. Do some of you just just don't like or something? I mean I give my imput about alot of things, but some of you just tend to move on and talk with others. I don't really understand this.

I ABSOLUTELY agree with this; I feel the same way. I don't know about school and church, but this board, yes, you are right. I feel like there is a very tightly knit clique (sp.?) here, and newcomers are not really made to feel welcome. Or, maybe these people just don't like us, who knows? You get one or two welcome messages, and then everyone just carries on as though everyone here has known everyone else here forever --except you. Anyhow, I'll survive, and I think you will, too. Take care of yourself. You never know when something good is right around the next corner.:cool:

Quelonio
10-23-2005, 12:33 AM
I ABSOLUTELY agree with this; I feel the same way. I don't know about school and church, but this board, yes, you are right. I feel like there is a very tightly knit clique (sp.?) here, and newcomers are not really made to feel welcome. Or, maybe these people just don't like us, who knows? You get one or two welcome messages, and then everyone just carries on as though everyone here has known everyone else here forever --except you. Anyhow, I'll survive, and I think you will, too. Take care of yourself. You never know when something good is right around the next corner.:cool:


A good thing that helps is posting outside of the main forum, since most people that have been here for a while start recognizing you once you are in the less clutered forums. Also it helps if you got a recognizable avatar and signature. But cliques will always be formed. it is the way it is. still we are a very accepting group, you just have to let yourself be known (I joined survivor and that helped)

Dubfire
10-23-2005, 12:55 AM
()

Jt0323
10-23-2005, 01:15 AM
()
:confused:

RWhitney014
10-23-2005, 01:20 AM
I ABSOLUTELY agree with this; I feel the same way. I don't know about school and church, but this board, yes, you are right. I feel like there is a very tightly knit clique (sp.?) here, and newcomers are not really made to feel welcome. Or, maybe these people just don't like us, who knows? You get one or two welcome messages, and then everyone just carries on as though everyone here has known everyone else here forever --except you. Anyhow, I'll survive, and I think you will, too. Take care of yourself. You never know when something good is right around the next corner.:cool:

Well, I think that for newbies there's definitely a period where you kind of have to prove yourself. It can be done in many ways, like when PressCoverage broke the news that Will Poole tore his ACL, he started a near-riot, was considered a troll, and was put on a pedestal when it turned out he was right. Or you can come on, make smart posts, and get accepted that way. But you have to post in non-main forums to get recognized in places like the Lounge. That's just the way it works by human nature. But I don't think anyone actively ostracizes anyone else, and whole groups certainly don't.

texasPHINSfan
10-23-2005, 02:53 AM
Ace i'd like to offer my help too.... i've been in your very shoes, and although i have credentials of experience to help you, i won't post my story here.

if you ever run out of support (which judging by my fellow finheaven bretheren you will never do), i am another option... feel free to PM me or email me.... i have been through all the same stuff you are going through (and i think its important for you to realize that just about everyone has gone through what you are going through)... YOU ARE NOT ALONE my friend!

I wish you the best and hope everything works out for you.... also keep in mind that not everyone thinks that way about you on here.... i personally value your membership here and would love to see that posting trend continue! stick around man, we need the Ace on finheaven! :D

DolphinDevil28
10-23-2005, 05:48 AM
Ace, I PM'd you.

Get back to me on that.



Good 'ole DD28 is willing to help.

NJFinFury2004
10-23-2005, 06:22 AM
hmmm, I've never noticed that Ace. You have had a pouty attitude lately but i figured the stresses of being young and uncertain. Lighten up on yourself, you have a bright future, even if you do not yet see it for yourself. Remember this... no-one can do anything to you, they can't make you happy, sad, angry or anything, until you let them. Most people are happy or sad because they choose it. Simply chose not to be sad or whatever. If interaction here has become less interesting find other things to occupy yourself. I read and study history, find your own thing but improve yourself. Read everything, engage in worthwhile projects, help a friend, or make a new one. Nothing will get you out of yourself as quickly as helping someone else, nothing. It has value to both parties beyond the act itself. Keep your chin up, there are others out there that understand the feeling, I learned to work on me.

Cnn Nicely put.

Ace IM 39 years old, so listen to the old man when I say " You can't make everyone like you" You are at an awkward stage in life and things will get clearer the older you get. You are trying to find your way right now and who you are, that will all come.

During that time? Have fun with your life. It shouldn't matter to you if anyone agrees with you or not. I for one, have always enjoyed your posts and input and have actually thought " Wow that kid is much brighter than I was at 16" You have a whole lifetime ahead of you.
Good Looking Girls to nail LOL
Accomplishments that make you feel like a King
Maybe even watching Miami win 3 or 4 Superbowls at your age!!
A family to start and cherish!

It's just that at your age, it's hard to see all these things clear. Why not go speak to someone at school? A counselor? Tell him how you feel and maybe you can work through some of these problems together and make yourself feel better.

It never hurts to ask God for help either. :D

cnc66
10-23-2005, 06:30 AM
I ABSOLUTELY agree with this; I feel the same way. I don't know about school and church, but this board, yes, you are right. I feel like there is a very tightly knit clique (sp.?) here, and newcomers are not really made to feel welcome. Or, maybe these people just don't like us, who knows? You get one or two welcome messages, and then everyone just carries on as though everyone here has known everyone else here forever --except you. Anyhow, I'll survive, and I think you will, too. Take care of yourself. You never know when something good is right around the next corner.:cool:

If it's any consolation I felt much the same. The only other board I had ever hung out on, we all became friends...still are. When I arrived here I felt ignored and irrelevent. Take the time to PM someone when they write something you feel is worthwhile, apologise when youv'e been an idiot(I have several of those embarrising events in my post history) and treat others as you would wish to be treated. It takes time, the place is hugh and there is much sand to be sifted in order to find the diamonds, but they are here. My irrelevance still stands, but i have made cyber friends. Some, when we actually get to meet may even become personal friends and there is never enough of those. Hang in there, most of the senior guys have seen thousands of newbies, most of which just disappear.. and they are wary sometimes about new guys. You are your own person and really do not need MY approval to find self worth, so don't count on it. Do something today that YOU are proud of and be damned the rest of us, find value in your own actions. Living your life seeking the approval of others can be very disappointing. Make yourself a little better today than you were yesterday, learn something new, practice a new skill, give the gift of personal attention to someone who needs it. Never in human history has so many opportunities been available to explore, don't sit in the back of the roller coaster with your eyes closed, get in the front row open your eyes throw your arms up and enjoy the ride. It is after all YOUR ride so find things to enjoy while your are aboard. Peace!

dol_fan_81
10-23-2005, 06:53 AM
c'mon Ace, we all feel like we are being ignored on here (especially me), I am usually the last to post on a forum :lol: but it aint so bad man, we are all here for ya bro :up:

Muck
10-23-2005, 08:33 AM
Don't take it personally.

Half the time when I post, it ends up being the last post in a thread. I mean, I'm an administrator. And the majority of my posts don't get replies. It's not that people necessarily ignore you. It's just that the place is huge and people pick and choose their spots. Or they choose not to respond because they know they won't be able to continue a discussion much longer (time, availability).

Personally, I have much less free time now than I used to have. So I find myself reading more and posting less in order to keep up. I'll read something and think, "that was a good post". But I don't respond because my time is limited and there are more threads I want to read before I have to log off.

Also......remember, there's usually 2-3 times as many lurkers as there are registered members on at any given time. :)

Keep your chin up.

WharfRat
10-23-2005, 09:40 AM
I mean, I'm an administrator. And the majority of my posts don't get replies.

:yeahthat: Me too.... however, in my case, it's probably because I'm always hi-jacking threads with my wise cracks...

:foundout:

Fin Fan in Cali
10-23-2005, 09:46 AM
If it's any consolation I felt much the same. The only other board I had ever hung out on, we all became friends...still are. When I arrived here I felt ignored and irrelevent. Take the time to PM someone when they write something you feel is worthwhile, apologise when youv'e been an idiot(I have several of those embarrising events in my post history) and treat others as you would wish to be treated. It takes time, the place is hugh and there is much sand to be sifted in order to find the diamonds, but they are here. My irrelevance still stands, but i have made cyber friends. Some, when we actually get to meet may even become personal friends and there is never enough of those. Hang in there, most of the senior guys have seen thousands of newbies, most of which just disappear.. and they are wary sometimes about new guys. You are your own person and really do not need MY approval to find self worth, so don't count on it. Do something today that YOU are proud of and be damned the rest of us, find value in your own actions. Living your life seeking the approval of others can be very disappointing. Make yourself a little better today than you were yesterday, learn something new, practice a new skill, give the gift of personal attention to someone who needs it. Never in human history has so many opportunities been available to explore, don't sit in the back of the roller coaster with your eyes closed, get in the front row open your eyes throw your arms up and enjoy the ride. It is after all YOUR ride so find things to enjoy while your are aboard. Peace!Great post Marty!:)

finswin56
10-23-2005, 10:18 AM
Ace, there has been some very good advise in this thread... probably better than anything I can say. I don't know about you, but I often find that anything that I could have or would have said is already out there, and usually expressed better than I could have done. So, more often than not, I do not post and just read. I have nothing to add that hasn't already been said. Everyone probably has their stories about suicide and/or friends suffering from depression. I know I have mine, but they're not much different than you've already heard.

I only post so that you know you are not alone. You don't know me from Adam, but I am always available. The one thing I want to stress is to rely on your parents. If they know about your struggles, they will do anything to help. No matter what kind of stress your relationship with your parents is currently under, you need to trust them. I am certain you are what they live for.

Jt0323
10-23-2005, 10:23 AM
Suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem

GreenMonster
10-23-2005, 10:25 AM
Ace, I don't think anyone on FinHeaven goes out of there way to make anyone feel unwelcome. Although I have been here only a short time I have made many new friends. While viewing the main forums, FaninPatsLand saw my name GreenMonster and invited me to post in the RedSox thread in the Other Sports forum. I had never visited anything but the Main forum and was thrilled to see many Redsox and Yankee homers intelligently discussing baseball and other sports. I now have many friends I am sure I will talk with more as baseball starts again next year.. Point is.......

Although we may all be different people, with different views on things, on thing we have in common is the Dolphins. I am pretty sure I would be happy to spend any 3 hours the Dolphins game our on with any fan on this site. You have plenty of friends here at FinHeaven, trust me.

FIN-IN-RI
10-23-2005, 03:34 PM
I won't man...I won't. Mostly though, I need to try to help myself as much as I can.

Hey buddy.. take my advice.. my advice is, don't try and do this all by yourself.. you need support, no, not e-support.. support from a counselor/teacher/parent/responsible adult :)

Trust me.

FIN-IN-RI
10-23-2005, 03:37 PM
Don't take it personally.

Half the time when I post, it ends up being the last post in a thread. I mean, I'm an administrator. And the majority of my posts don't get replies. It's not that people necessarily ignore you. It's just that the place is huge and people pick and choose their spots. Or they choose not to respond because they know they won't be able to continue a discussion much longer (time, availability).

Personally, I have much less free time now than I used to have. So I find myself reading more and posting less in order to keep up. I'll read something and think, "that was a good post". But I don't respond because my time is limited and there are more threads I want to read before I have to log off.

Also......remember, there's usually 2-3 times as many lurkers as there are registered members on at any given time. :)

Keep your chin up.

yeah good point..

ppl dont reply to my posts that much either...:hmmm:



:foundout:

dol_fan_81
10-23-2005, 03:39 PM
Suicide is a permanent solution for a temporary problem

and no one heres gonna be doing that right? :)

FIN-IN-RI
10-23-2005, 03:40 PM
You do need support but the main thing is, is that only you can make the change. I don't mean to sound contradictory but I think you get the point.

Be strong brother.

I'm glad the finheaven crew in this thread has helped you out.. we all should give ourselves a pat on the back.

FIN-IN-RI
10-23-2005, 03:41 PM
:yeahthat: Me too.... however, in my case, it's probably because I'm always hi-jacking threads with my wise cracks...

:foundout:

it is wharf.. it is.. :nono:

BlitPhinFan
10-23-2005, 04:21 PM
Ace88,

I am sorry I got here so late. I am happy to read that you're rethinking things. We are all here pulling for you to get through this. Stay strong and know that we are all here for you. My PM box is completely empty. Feel free to fill it up. :up:

LittlePaulie
10-23-2005, 05:33 PM
Ace, you have to know that while we each live within ourselves, with all the isolation of emotion that that entails, others also live in their own world. Most people ignore each other not out of any animosity or lack of caring, but just from the hecticness of our daily existences.

When you're in the working world you'll be more able to appreciate what I mean; for instance, I have friends here in Seattle that I haven't seen in over a year. They're dear friends, and my girl and I love them and appreciate them. Yet here we are, involved in our own daily scurrying about, and a year has passed since we last saw them. Crazy, isn't it? Yet there it is. Should we make time to see them? Of course. Do we? Something always seems to get in the way.

Same here on the board. We all have posters we like better than others; we see their posts, and we read them, but 90% of the time we don't necessarily respond. Doesn't mean we don't think of it, but sometimes it's lack of time, or not having anything pertinent to add to the conversation. But it doesn't mean we don't still think the same of that poster.

I think of you as one of the good things at FinHeaven, one of the mainstays; if you didn't post anymore, I would miss you. I like reading you, the way I like reading a lot of other posters here whom I don't know very well or have a lot of interaction with, yet like nonetheless.

Also, I - and a lot of others on this board - need to be aware of how our actions affect others. Sometimes we get caught up in cliques, or conversations, that are by nature exclusionary. A good example is the 3am crew. I'm sure that it didn't start out as being soemthing that was meant to make anyone feel excluded or not wanted - but by its very nature (the time at which it takes place) alone I think it ends up being exclusionary to an extent. The "Warriors" theme takes it a step further, as by its nature only a certain number of posters can participate.

So to partially remedy this, I offer you my place as Vermin on the crew. Take the badge as your own, and join in on the fun and merriment - I feel certain that the rest of the crew aren't going to have any problem with it, and they'll be glad to include you. I'll still be around occassionaly, but my work is taking me more and more to a day schedule, so I wouldn't be able to honor my commitment to the crew anyway. Just watch out for Gonzo, he's trouble.

But I urge you also to try to get out of yourself, and find activities with other people - things that even might seem silly or a waste of time now, but if you get involved you will find yourself enjoying, like groups at school or church, or maybe a local rec center. Talk to your parents or your minister about this, and get their feedback.

But whatever you do, don't let your sense of self-worth, your sense of self, be reliant on a bunch of nameless, faceless people on here that you've never met. Go out and do real things, with real people, and live for real. And I hope you can tell the difference between good advice (like cnc says, READ!) and bad (drinking helps...:shakeno: ) and choose wisely.

And if you want to vent to us faceless souls, by all means, that's what this forum is for. Just get out and live as well.


I like this one ace88! It'll come together in time! I appreciate your time here on the board bro!!:)

ROSCO P.C. JR
10-23-2005, 05:42 PM
hey ace I feel like that a lot especially when i am trying to be a comedian like plus i like your opinions . your going throught post wanny stress but there is hope . wanny is gone and we will win again and a new qb is on the way . many things that i can say has me depressed. heck my college team is 0-4 in conference this year and my boy chambers is having a bad year but the sun will come out tomarrow at least in okla.

keep your chin up the dolphins will rise agian.:cool:

TheAnswer385
10-23-2005, 05:43 PM
its ok ace ur ok im my little book

KB21
10-23-2005, 06:55 PM
Ace, what part of Kentucky are you from?

I'm currently in Pikeville, KY. I attend the medical school at Pikeville College.

Whatsdatson20
10-23-2005, 08:28 PM
Hey man you are great dude! I know I dont know you personally but I strongly believe that EVERYONE has greatness in them. ITS GOD GIVEN. Look man anytime you wanna talk heres my AIM... whatsdatson20. My email is godsson18@hotmail.com . Im also on msn messenger. PM me anytime you like. I just want to let you know that I got your back.

Prime
10-23-2005, 09:29 PM
You guys have helped me alot. I went to chruch today and I wanted to see if I felt in different. Well, I sure did. I didn't feel sorry for myself, instead I felt angry and I felt like I have a burning flame inside of me. Now I don't know if that is an improvment or not, but atleast I feel different.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-23-2005, 09:32 PM
You guys have helped me alot. I went to chruch today and I wanted to see if I felt in different. Well, I sure did. I didn't feel sorry for myself, instead I felt angry and I felt like I have a burning flame inside of me. Now I don't know if that is an improvment or not, but atleast I feel different.Ace as I said in the pm we are here for you when you need someone to talk to or to just vent. This is what family is all about. Keep your chin, and keep smiling!;)

dolphan117
10-23-2005, 09:47 PM
Hey buddy.. take my advice.. my advice is, don't try and do this all by yourself.. you need support, no, not e-support.. support from a counselor/teacher/parent/responsible adult :)

Trust me.

Very true. If you are dealing with ongoing depresion you need someone to talk to who can help you figure out why you feel this way. Its usualy somthing in the past that has changed the way you think about yourself/the world. I have dealt with a great deal of depression during my life and it wasnt untill I got some professional help that I was able to confront and put some of those things to rest. At times its not much fun but in the long run its worth it.
Another thing that realy helps is if you can find friends to hang out with where you can just be yourself. There is a great deal of sanity that can be gained just from that. :) Ill be pray'n for ya.

Fin Fan in Cali
10-23-2005, 09:52 PM
You guys have helped me alot. I went to chruch today and I wanted to see if I felt in different. Well, I sure did. I didn't feel sorry for myself, instead I felt angry and I felt like I have a burning flame inside of me. Now I don't know if that is an improvment or not, but atleast I feel different.Nice sig!

dol_fan_81
10-24-2005, 07:19 AM
You guys have helped me alot. I went to chruch today and I wanted to see if I felt in different. Well, I sure did. I didn't feel sorry for myself, instead I felt angry and I felt like I have a burning flame inside of me. Now I don't know if that is an improvment or not, but atleast I feel different.

anger? good, use that in the depths or in a football game! :fire:

FinHeathen
10-25-2005, 10:16 AM
You guys have helped me alot. I went to chruch today and I wanted to see if I felt in different. Well, I sure did. I didn't feel sorry for myself, instead I felt angry and I felt like I have a burning flame inside of me. Now I don't know if that is an improvment or not, but atleast I feel different.

Now, unleash your hatred, young Skywalker! Crush the infidels!

Buddwalk
10-25-2005, 11:11 AM
Now, unleash your hatred, young Skywalker! Crush the infidels!

[Darth Vader Breathing]

http://www.finheaven.com/images/imported/2005/10/EpisodeIIIVaderL-1.jpg

[Imperial March Theme plays]