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Marino2Clayton
12-14-2005, 02:19 AM
Here are a few from one of my favorites...

[In an Irish accent] I'll believe ya when me **** turns purple and smells like rainbow sherbet.

Bear....Bear... bearf***er, do you need assistance?!?

It stinks like sex in here.

License and registration please, CHICKEN F***ER!

How's the view from sugar heaven, b****!!!

...and that was the second time I got crabs.

Nappy Roots
12-14-2005, 02:23 AM
easy supertroopers


easily a favorite of all time

Marino2Clayton
12-14-2005, 02:29 AM
easy supertroopers


easily a favorite of all time

:chuckle:

Marino2Clayton
12-14-2005, 02:48 AM
Here is another of my all time favorites...

"What would you do if you had a million dollars?"
"I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man."
"That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?"
"Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money."
"Well, not all chicks."
"Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do."

RAS25
12-14-2005, 03:03 AM
Here is another of my all time favorites...

"What would you do if you had a million dollars?"
"I'll tell you what I'd do, man, two chicks at the same time, man."
"That's it? If you had a million dollars, you'd do two chicks at the same time?"
"Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I had a million dollars I could hook that up, cause chicks dig a dude with money."
"Well, not all chicks."
"Well the kind of chicks that'd double up on a dude like me do."

i belive you have my stapler....


great movie also:lol:

Marino2Clayton
12-14-2005, 03:15 AM
i belive you have my stapler....


great movie also:lol:


Hello, RAS25. What's happening? We need to talk about your TPS reports.

RAS25
12-14-2005, 03:17 AM
Hello, RAS25. What's happening? We need to talk about your TPS reports.

:rofl: truly a great movie

d-day
12-14-2005, 05:10 AM
Roy: How about a gross of fluorescent condoms for the the novelty machine in the men's room? I mean, those are fun even when you're alone. We're talkin' the hula hoop of the nineties!
Lancaster Bowl Manager: Look, I've told you! We don't need nuthin'! We don't even have a novelty machine in the men's room anymore!
Roy: And you call yourselves a bowling alley?

PressCoverage
12-14-2005, 05:13 AM
"Careful, man! There's a beverage here!!!!!"

saves
12-14-2005, 01:28 PM
the big lebowski
what a good movie

Marino2Clayton
12-15-2005, 02:01 AM
"Why don't you get a job Spicoli?"
"What for?"
"You need money."
"All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I'm fine."

GRAPEAPE
12-15-2005, 11:59 AM
"Why don't you get a job Spicoli?"
"What for?"
"You need money."
"All I need are some tasty waves, a cool buzz, and I'm fine."Fast time Ridgemont high.

"Over, did you say over? Nothing is over until we decide it is, was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

ch19079
12-15-2005, 12:10 PM
Fast time Ridgemont high.

"Over, did you say over? Nothing is over until we decide it is, was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor? i want to say thats from Family Guy, but thats a TV show. :(

lazlo73
12-15-2005, 12:12 PM
Roy: How about a gross of fluorescent condoms for the the novelty machine in the men's room? I mean, those are fun even when you're alone. We're talkin' the hula hoop of the nineties!
Lancaster Bowl Manager: Look, I've told you! We don't need nuthin'! We don't even have a novelty machine in the men's room anymore!
Roy: And you call yourselves a bowling alley?

Kingpin

ch19079
12-15-2005, 12:18 PM
"Me I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly it's the honest ones you have to watch out for, you never can predict if they're going to do something incredibly stupid."

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 12:21 PM
Kingpin
Vanessa Angel :hump:

UltraDol-Fan
12-15-2005, 12:44 PM
"Me I'm dishonest, and a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly it's the honest ones you have to watch out for, you never can predict if they're going to do something incredibly stupid."

Pirates of the Carribean, man that's a great movie.

Section126
12-15-2005, 01:34 PM
"Heyyyy youuu guyyys!"


:rofl3:


The Goonies

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 03:59 PM
Awick Balgwin.....
Mat Damon.

ChrisKo
12-15-2005, 05:18 PM
"Over, did you say over? Nothing is over until we decide it is, was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?

Animal House

Wonder who gets this one?

"Murder, what do you mean murder?"

UncleCosmic
12-15-2005, 05:29 PM
Awick Balgwin.....
Mat Damon.

Team America: World Police

Rocky Raccoon
12-15-2005, 05:36 PM
Animal House

Wonder who gets this one?

"Murder, what do you mean murder?"

Clue

The_Dark_Knight
12-15-2005, 07:02 PM
Fast time Ridgemont high.

"Over, did you say over? Nothing is over until we decide it is, was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor?
Animal House

The_Dark_Knight
12-15-2005, 07:04 PM
Here's one for you...

"Pumps one and two, hit 'em"

"Are you crazy mac, you got one leaded and one unleaded"

"She goes both ways"

poornate
12-15-2005, 08:43 PM
"....you! Music lover!....."

Kobe
12-15-2005, 09:34 PM
The new phone book's here! The new phone book's here! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need! My name in print! That really makes somebody! Things are going to start happening to me now.

poornate
12-15-2005, 09:37 PM
Death to Smoochy?

poornate
12-15-2005, 09:37 PM
Was there an edit i missed?

ih8brady
12-15-2005, 09:39 PM
Ok, first things f---ing last!

Kobe
12-15-2005, 09:41 PM
Was there an edit i missed?

Yea, I thought it was kinda wrong :tongue:

poornate
12-15-2005, 09:43 PM
Was it Death To smoochy?

Kobe
12-15-2005, 09:44 PM
Was it Death To smoochy?

Yea it was. I think that movie was pretty bad but that part was funny.

poornate
12-15-2005, 09:47 PM
I thought the movie was pretty funny actually...

"you gonna skin that smoke wagon or stand there and bleed?"

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 10:29 PM
I thought the movie was pretty funny actually...

"you gonna skin that smoke wagon or stand there and bleed?"

Was that Tombstone?

spydertl79
12-15-2005, 10:50 PM
This ****s chess, it aint checkers!

To protect the sheep you gotta catch the wolf, and it takes a wolf to catch a wolf

A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): How much money was in that bag?
B: 40 G's.
A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): What was that for?
B (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000243/): You really wanna know?
A: Yeah. I asked, didn't I?
B (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000243/): Nothing's free in this world, Jake. Not even arrest warrants.
A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): ****, I didn't wanna know.

wazzy
12-15-2005, 10:59 PM
This ****s chess, it aint checkers!

To protect the sheep you gotta catch the wolf, and it takes a wolf to catch a wolf

A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): How much money was in that bag?
B: 40 G's.
A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): What was that for?
B (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000243/): You really wanna know?
A: Yeah. I asked, didn't I?
B (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000243/): Nothing's free in this world, Jake. Not even arrest warrants.
A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): ****, I didn't wanna know.

Training Day!

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 10:59 PM
This ****s chess, it aint checkers!

To protect the sheep you gotta catch the wolf, and it takes a wolf to catch a wolf

A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): How much money was in that bag?
B: 40 G's.
A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): What was that for?
B (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000243/): You really wanna know?
A: Yeah. I asked, didn't I?
B (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000243/): Nothing's free in this world, Jake. Not even arrest warrants.
A (http://imdb.com/name/nm0000160/): ****, I didn't wanna know.

Training Day.

Edit-^beat me to it Wazzy.

wazzy
12-15-2005, 11:00 PM
Training Day.

Edit-^beat me to it Wazzy.


LOL Ya!

wazzy
12-15-2005, 11:01 PM
It was a great movie! They finally gave Denzel Washington the best actor award which I think was long overdue I also liked him in Man on Fire that movie was insane but it did not get a lot of buzz!

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 11:02 PM
"Do you think God will forgive us for what we've done? Me neither."

"I wish......you.. had.... more time. You dont but I do."

spydertl79
12-15-2005, 11:11 PM
Denzel is definitely one of the best actors out there and he's one of my personal favorites. His performance in Training Day was AWESOME!

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 11:18 PM
"Do you think God will forgive us for what we've done? Me neither."

"I wish......you.. had.... more time. You dont but I do."

Man on Fire?

"And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig ****, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig"."

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 11:34 PM
Man on Fire?

"And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig ****, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig"."

Yup, I know I have heard that^ quote to but I cant remeber what it was from. It wasnt a Godfather movie was it?

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 11:39 PM
Yup, I know I have heard that^ quote to but I cant remeber what it was from. It wasnt a Godfather movie was it?

Nope... I will give you the characters name though... Brick Top.

PHINATIC13
12-15-2005, 11:42 PM
Snatch

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 11:43 PM
Was it Snatch?

Edit-Beaten again. :cry: :cry:

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 11:43 PM
Snatch

:up:

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 11:43 PM
Was it Snatch?

Yeppers. :D

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 11:46 PM
How about-
"Misdirection Stan."

Edit-Found the quote I realy wanted -
"You know what the problem with Hollywood is? They make ****. Unbelievable, unremarkable ****. Now I'm not some grungy wannabe filmmaker that's searching for existentialism through a haze of bong smoke or something. No, it's easy to pick apart bad acting, short-sighted directing, and a purely moronic stringing together of words that many of the studios term as "prose". No, I'm talking about the lack of realism. Realism; not a pervasive element in today's modern American cinematic vision. Take Dog Day Afternoon, for example. Arguably Pacino's best work, short of Scarface and Godfather Part 1, of course. Masterpiece of directing, easily Lumet's best. The cinematography, the acting, the screenplay, all top-notch. But... they didn't push the envelope. Now what if in Dog Day, Sonny REALLY wanted to get away with it? What if - now here's the tricky part - what if he started killing hostages right away? No mercy, no quarter. "Meet our demands or the pretty blonde in the bellbottoms gets it the back of the head." Bam, splat! What, still no bus? Come on! How many innocent victims splattered across a window would it take to have the city reverse its policy on hostage situations? And this is 1976; there's no CNN, there's no CNBC, there's no internet! Now fast forward to today, present time, same situation. How quickly would the modern media make a frenzy over this? In a matter of hours, it'd be biggest story from Boston to Budapest! Ten hostages die, twenty, thirty; bam bam, right after another, all caught in high-def, computer-enhanced, color corrected. You can practically taste the brain matter. All for what? A bus, a plane? A couple of million dollars that's federally insured? I don't think so. Just a thought. I mean, it's not within the realm of conventional cinema... but what if?"

PHINATIC13
12-15-2005, 11:48 PM
Truth be be told................................I cheated.......... googled Brick Top:nono:

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 11:49 PM
How about-
"Misdirection Stan."

I am at a loss on that one.

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 11:51 PM
Truth be be told................................I cheated.......... googled Brick Top:nono:

:lol: Great movie! You should check it out! "You like dags?" Possibly the only performence by Brad Pitt that I could stomach. And no... he didn't play Brick Top... but he still did a stand up job as a gypsy in the movie.

dolphan117
12-15-2005, 11:54 PM
:lol: Great movie! You should check it out! "You like dags?" Possibly the only performence by Brad Pitt that I could stomach. And no... he didn't play Brick Top... but he still did a stand up job as a gypsy in the movie.

He was very good in that. ^ see if the new quote rings any bells.

BlitPhinFan
12-15-2005, 11:58 PM
He was very good in that. ^ see if the new quote rings any bells.

Swordfish?

PHINATIC13
12-15-2005, 11:58 PM
:lol: Great movie! You should check it out! "You like dags?" Possibly the only performence by Brad Pitt that I could stomach. And no... he didn't play Brick Top... but he still did a stand up job as a gypsy in the movie.


I saw the movie Blit, just didn't recall that quote.I guess I should see it again apparently I didn't pay close enough attention.:D

Fight Club was a fairly good Brad Pitt movie.I think Seven was the best movie he's made though(a lot of help from Morgan Freeman).

dolphan117
12-16-2005, 12:00 AM
Swordfish?

Yup. :up:

BlitPhinFan
12-16-2005, 12:02 AM
I saw the movie Blit, just did recall that quote.I guess I should see it again apparently I didn't pay close enough attention.:D

Fight Club was a fairly good Brad Pitt movie.I think Seven was the best movie he's made though(a lot of help from Morgan Freeman).

Seven was good. I wasn't a big fan of Fight Club... granted I found the references in The Undercity of World of Warcraft humorous but, for some strange reason the movie didn't really make a lasting impression on me like Snatch. Perhaps it was the story line and the supporting cast that really made that movie for me(ala Morgan Freeman).

BlitPhinFan
12-16-2005, 12:02 AM
Yup. :up:

:whew:

dolphan117
12-16-2005, 12:18 AM
Here is an easy one-"I knew a man once who said, "Death smiles at us all... All a man can do is smile back."

PeaTearGriffin
12-16-2005, 12:21 AM
"And shepherds we shall be, for thee my Lord for thee, Power hath descended forth from thy hand, that our feet may swiftly carry out thy command, we shall flow a river forth to thee, and teeming with souls shall it ever be. In nomine patris, et filii...et spiritus sancti."

PeaTearGriffin
12-16-2005, 12:36 AM
Here is an easy one-"I knew a man once who said, "Death smiles at us all... All a man can do is smile back."

"I wonder did your friend smile at his own death?"

dolphan117
12-16-2005, 12:38 AM
"I wonder did your friend smile at his own death?"

"You should know, he was your father." ;)

PeaTearGriffin
12-16-2005, 12:41 AM
is there anything after that??? i can't think of anything else

Marino2Clayton
12-16-2005, 01:19 AM
Heres one from another all-time classic....

"There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?"

d-day
12-16-2005, 03:02 AM
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster and drank pina coladas. At sunset we made love like sea otters. *That* was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over and over and over...

ChrisKo
12-16-2005, 03:34 AM
I was in the Virgin Islands once. I met a girl. We ate lobster and drank pina coladas. At sunset we made love like sea otters. *That* was a pretty good day. Why couldn't I get that day over and over and over...

GroundHog's Day

ChrisKo
12-16-2005, 03:35 AM
Heres one from another all-time classic....

"There's no reason to become alarmed, and we hope you'll enjoy the rest of your flight. By the way, is there anyone on board who knows how to fly a plane?"

Airplane: The Movie

Cut me som' slac' jak! Chump don' wan' no help, chump don' git no help. Jive *** dude don' got no brains anyhow.

ChrisKo
12-16-2005, 03:38 AM
Guess this one:

"I hope it feels so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilerating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?"

"Melodrama coming from you is about as normal as a bowel movement"

ch19079
12-16-2005, 09:44 AM
"And shepherds we shall be, for thee my Lord for thee, Power hath descended forth from thy hand, that our feet may swiftly carry out thy command, we shall flow a river forth to thee, and teeming with souls shall it ever be. In nomine patris, et filii...et spiritus sancti." boondock saints

a very good movie, with very bad accents. :lol:

ch19079
12-16-2005, 09:45 AM
Guess this one:

"I hope it feels so good to be right. There's nothing more exhilerating than pointing out the shortcomings of others, is there?"

"Melodrama coming from you is about as normal as a bowel movement" Clerks

ch19079
12-16-2005, 09:49 AM
Eddie: They're armed.
Soap: Armed, armed with what?
Eddie: Err, bad breath, colorful language, feather duster... what do you think they're gonna be armed with? Guns, you tit.


"If the milk turns out to be sour, I ain't the kinda ***** to drink it."




EDIT: ***** means a slag term for female genitalia. :D

The_Dark_Knight
12-16-2005, 12:08 PM
Here's one for you...

"Pumps one and two, hit 'em"

"Are you crazy mac, you got one leaded and one unleaded"

"She goes both ways"
I don't think anyone guessed it. Either gave up or felt it wasn't worth it, but for those who did wanna know, the answer is "Cannonball Run", filling up at the 7 Eleven

The_Dark_Knight
12-16-2005, 12:10 PM
Another one...

"If I'm not back in five minutes...just wait longer..."

PeaTearGriffin
12-16-2005, 01:31 PM
Eddie: They're armed.
Soap: Armed, armed with what?
Eddie: Err, bad breath, colorful language, feather duster... what do you think they're gonna be armed with? Guns, you tit.


"If the milk turns out to be sour, I ain't the kinda ***** to drink it."

EDIT: ***** means a slag term for female genitalia. :D

lock, stock and two smoking barrels...i think?

ch19079
12-16-2005, 05:16 PM
lock, stock and two smoking barrels...i think? correct. that was a great movie. its liek they liked it so much they gave the director a huge budget to make the same type movie in hollywood and he made Snatch.

both are great movies.

PeaTearGriffin
12-16-2005, 05:23 PM
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room."

Marino2Clayton
12-17-2005, 01:37 AM
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room."


One of the all time greats... Dr. Strangelove

Marino2Clayton
12-17-2005, 01:44 AM
Another one...

"If I'm not back in five minutes...just wait longer..."

"Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in Hell."

Wildbill3
12-17-2005, 02:11 AM
"Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in Hell."Ace ventura?


"what are you always bleeding for?"

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 03:04 AM
Ace ventura?


"what are you always bleeding for?"

C'mon Wildbill throw us a bone man:(

d-day
12-17-2005, 04:09 AM
Lucky Day: Well, we're just gonna have to use our brains.
Ned Nedelander, Dusty Bottoms: Damn it!

Mexican girl: Which one do you like?
Other Mexican girl: I like the one that's not so smart.
Mexican girl: Which one is that?

Rosita: I was thinking later, you could kiss me on the veranda.
Dusty Bottoms: Lips would be fine.

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 04:10 AM
Lucky Day: Well, we're just gonna have to use our brains.
Ned Nedelander, Dusty Bottoms: Damn it!

Mexican girl: Which one do you like?
Other Mexican girl: I like the one that's not so smart.
Mexican girl: Which one is that?

Rosita: I was thinking later, you could kiss me on the veranda.
Dusty Bottoms: Lips would be fine.


3 Amigos :D

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 04:11 AM
Champagne to my real friends, and I'm a real pain to my sham friends.

Marino2Clayton
12-17-2005, 04:32 AM
"I ain't got time to bleed."

Megatron
12-17-2005, 04:33 AM
"I ain't got time to bleed."Bambi.

d-day
12-17-2005, 04:37 AM
Bambi.

:chuckle:

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 04:43 AM
"I ain't got time to bleed."


PREDATOR

d-day
12-17-2005, 04:45 AM
Dr. Marvin: All's I want is some peace and quiet!
Bob: Okay I'll be quiet.
Siggy: And I'll be peace!

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 04:46 AM
"Imagine you're a deer, prancing along and you spot a little brook. You put your deer lips down to the cool clear water when BAM! A ****in' 9 mm takes off part of your hear, your guts are laying around in little bloody pieces. Now I ak's ya, would you give a **** what color pants the son-of-a-***** who shot you was wearin'?"

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 04:53 AM
Dr. Marvin: All's I want is some peace and quiet!
Bob: Okay I'll be quiet.
Siggy: And I'll be peace!


What About Bob:D

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 04:56 AM
"A looper. You know, a caddy, a looper, jock. So I tell them I'm a pro jock, and who do you think they give me? The Dalai Lama, himself. The twelfth son of the Lama. The flowing robes, the grace, bald... striking. So, I'm on the first tee with him. I give him the driver. He hauls off and whacks one — big hitter, the Lama — long, into a 10,000 foot crevice right at the base of this glacier. Do you know what the Lama says?"



C'mon guys this ones ez

NY_FinFan_72
12-17-2005, 05:10 AM
Caddy Shack... NEXT ONE...

"You wear tights?"

"I wear the required uniform!"

"Tights..."

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 05:15 AM
Caddy Shack... NEXT ONE...

"You wear tights?"

"I wear the required uniform!"

"Tights..."


Is it the Breakfast club?

NY_FinFan_72
12-17-2005, 05:17 AM
Is it the Breakfast club?

Yup!

PHINATIC13
12-17-2005, 05:17 AM
"He can call me a flower if he wants to."

Wildbill3
12-17-2005, 06:17 AM
C'mon Wildbill throw us a bone man:(never a dull momment.

The_Dark_Knight
12-19-2005, 06:28 PM
-Darling, you're smoking the wrong end of the cigarette
-I know that

Marino2Clayton
12-21-2005, 03:40 AM
"He can call me a flower if he wants to."


Don't tell me that really is Bambi?

Marino2Clayton
12-21-2005, 03:53 AM
If these don't get a chuckle out of ya, I don't know what will...

"Ah. I look out there on all you wonderful guys and I say to myself... what I wouldn't give to be 20 years younger... and a woman".

"You know, I've personally flown over 194 missions and I was shot down on every one. Come to think of it, I've never landed a plane in my life."

"I would like to thank you for having us over for dinner last night. Cheryl and I thought the stroganoff was wonderful."
"But sir, we didn't have you over for dinner last night."
"Oh, very well. Then, where the hell was I? And who's Cheryl?"

"Admiral Benson!"
"Really? That's my name too."

"How are ya, sir?"
"Hawaii? Goddamn it, Bill, I'm supposed to be in California."

"God, that's loud. My ear canals are very sensitive. They're stainless steel. Took a bullet in Corregidor. Passed straight through."
[removes his earplugs]
"We have these to hold down the sound, sir."
"Oh, good. Thanks."
[swallows the earplugs]
"Let's hope they do the trick."

"Thompson wasn't that good a pilot, anyway. He only had a small family. The kids are a pain in the ***. The wife's on the sauce. Hell, poor *******'s better off dead. What size shoes do you wear?"
"A nine, sir."
"Good. It's settled then. We'll send Harley to the front."

"Gentlemen, we've waited a long time to hear this. In exactly five hours and 17 minutes, we hit the enemy toast."
"I think that's the enemy coast, sir."
"Huh? Coast? That'll take a little more planning. But it doesn't matter."

"Looks like enemy aircraft at 12 o'clock."
"Really? 12 o'clock? Well, that gives us about...25 minutes. Think I'll step out for a burger."

finfan187
12-21-2005, 11:02 AM
Hot Shots


Here's one for ya:

Bartender:"Is there something in the guitar case?"
Stranger: "Yes"
Bartender: "What?"
Stranger: "A guitar"

mor911
12-21-2005, 11:13 AM
Hot Shots


Here's one for ya:

Bartender:"Is there something in the guitar case?"
Stranger: "Yes"
Bartender: "What?"
Stranger: "A guitar"
Desperado?

Turkish (http://imdb.com/name/nm0005458/): **** me, hold tight. What's that?
Tommy (http://imdb.com/name/nm0334318/): It's me belt, Turkish.
Turkish (http://imdb.com/name/nm0005458/): No, Tommy. There's a gun in your trousers. What's a gun doing in your trousers?
Tommy (http://imdb.com/name/nm0334318/): It's for protection.
Turkish (http://imdb.com/name/nm0005458/): Protection from what? "Zee Germans"?

dolfan4good
12-21-2005, 11:14 AM
"Imagine you're a deer, prancing along and you spot a little brook. You put your deer lips down to the cool clear water when BAM! A ****in' 9 mm takes off part of your hear, your guts are laying around in little bloody pieces. Now I ak's ya, would you give a **** what color pants the son-of-a-***** who shot you was wearin'?"
My Cousin Vinny

GRAPEAPE
12-21-2005, 11:42 AM
Desperado?

Turkish (http://imdb.com/name/nm0005458/): **** me, hold tight. What's that?
Tommy (http://imdb.com/name/nm0334318/): It's me belt, Turkish.
Turkish (http://imdb.com/name/nm0005458/): No, Tommy. There's a gun in your trousers. What's a gun doing in your trousers?
Tommy (http://imdb.com/name/nm0334318/): It's for protection.
Turkish (http://imdb.com/name/nm0005458/): Protection from what? "Zee Germans"?
Snatch. I said snatch

"Race car? I'm a mushroom cloud layin mother****er mother****er, I'm superfly TNT, I am the guns of the Navarone, your *** outta be back here on brain detail"

"Look at the big brain on Brad"

"what do they look like Jimmy"?
"they look like dorks"
"They're your clothes mother****er"

d-day
12-21-2005, 12:25 PM
Snatch. I said snatch

"Race car? I'm a mushroom cloud layin mother****er mother****er, I'm superfly TNT, I am the guns of the Navarone, your *** outta be back here on brain detail"

"Look at the big brain on Brad"

"what do they look like Jimmy"?
"they look like dorks"
"They're your clothes mother****er"

pulp fiction

"your act is about as fresh as a foghat cocert"

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 01:28 PM
If these don't get a chuckle out of ya, I don't know what will...

"Ah. I look out there on all you wonderful guys and I say to myself... what I wouldn't give to be 20 years younger... and a woman".

"You know, I've personally flown over 194 missions and I was shot down on every one. Come to think of it, I've never landed a plane in my life."

"I would like to thank you for having us over for dinner last night. Cheryl and I thought the stroganoff was wonderful."
"But sir, we didn't have you over for dinner last night."
"Oh, very well. Then, where the hell was I? And who's Cheryl?"

"Admiral Benson!"
"Really? That's my name too."

"How are ya, sir?"
"Hawaii? Goddamn it, Bill, I'm supposed to be in California."

"God, that's loud. My ear canals are very sensitive. They're stainless steel. Took a bullet in Corregidor. Passed straight through."
[removes his earplugs]
"We have these to hold down the sound, sir."
"Oh, good. Thanks."
[swallows the earplugs]
"Let's hope they do the trick."

"Thompson wasn't that good a pilot, anyway. He only had a small family. The kids are a pain in the ***. The wife's on the sauce. Hell, poor *******'s better off dead. What size shoes do you wear?"
"A nine, sir."
"Good. It's settled then. We'll send Harley to the front."

"Gentlemen, we've waited a long time to hear this. In exactly five hours and 17 minutes, we hit the enemy toast."
"I think that's the enemy coast, sir."
"Huh? Coast? That'll take a little more planning. But it doesn't matter."

"Looks like enemy aircraft at 12 o'clock."
"Really? 12 o'clock? Well, that gives us about...25 minutes. Think I'll step out for a burger."
OMG, I forgot how dammed funny that movie was..

Lloyd Bridges made that movie, no doubt about it

GreenMonster
12-21-2005, 01:30 PM
Kingpin

I knew a man once who said, "Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back."

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 01:55 PM
Kingpin

I knew a man once who said, "Death smiles at us all. All a man can do is smile back."
Gladiator?

GreenMonster
12-21-2005, 02:02 PM
Gladiator?

Correct..

rujpett?
12-21-2005, 02:12 PM
Die Dan Die!

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 02:29 PM
Die Dan Die!
LT Einhorn in Ace Ventura, played by Sean Young who got her first movie break at the age of 19 in Blade Runner, starring Harrison Ford and Rutger Hauer..

Wow, i really went off on that one, didn't I?? LOL

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 02:37 PM
Alright, here's an old one..

There is no way, no way that you could come from my loins...
When I get home the first thing I'm gonna do is punch yo mama in the mouth

GRAPEAPE
12-21-2005, 02:47 PM
Alright, here's an old one..

There is no way, no way that you could come from my loins...
When I get home the first thing I'm gonna do is punch yo mama in the mouth
Smokey and the Bandit

"Thank you for playing should we, or should we not follow the advice of the galacticly stupid!"

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 03:20 PM
Smokey and the Bandit

"Thank you for playing should we, or should we not follow the advice of the galacticly stupid!"
A Few Good Men

How tall are you private
Sir, 5 foot 9 sir
5 foot nine, huh, I didn't know that stacked schidt that high, you trying squeeze in an inch on me?

GRAPEAPE
12-21-2005, 03:42 PM
Full Metal Jacket.

"Aaaaarmy traing sir"

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 04:38 PM
Full Metal Jacket.

"Aaaaarmy traing sir"
Stripes!!!

"Hello, we'd like you to have this flower from the Church of Religious Consciousness, would you care to make a donation?"

"No thanks, we gave at the office"

Rocky Raccoon
12-21-2005, 04:42 PM
"I think I, yea, wait, no, yea I just had an idea"

DrAstroZoom
12-21-2005, 05:38 PM
The new phone book's here! The new phone book's here! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity I need! My name in print! That really makes somebody! Things are going to start happening to me now.


I didn't see anyone get this. It's "The Jerk."

DrAstroZoom
12-21-2005, 05:38 PM
"I think I, yea, wait, no, yea I just had an idea"


"Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy?"

dolphan117
12-21-2005, 05:55 PM
Stripes!!!

"Hello, we'd like you to have this flower from the Church of Religious Consciousness, would you care to make a donation?"

"No thanks, we gave at the office"

Airplane.

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 06:12 PM
Airplane.
Correct

Uncle Rico II
12-21-2005, 07:26 PM
"I am a leaf on the wind - watch how I soar"

dolphan117
12-21-2005, 08:31 PM
"I am a leaf on the wind - watch how I soar"

Serenity (sp?)

PHINATIC13
12-21-2005, 09:51 PM
Today... is Christmas! There will be a magic show at zero-nine-thirty! Chaplain Charlie will tell you about how the free world will conquer Communism with the aid of God and a few marines! God has a hard-on for marines because we kill everything we see! He plays His games, we play ours! To show our appreciation for so much power, we keep heaven packed with fresh souls! God was here before the Marine Corps! So you can give your heart to Jesus, but your *** belongs to the Corps! Do you ladies understand?

The_Dark_Knight
12-21-2005, 11:29 PM
Today... is Christmas! There will be a magic show at zero-nine-thirty! Chaplain Charlie will tell you about how the free world will conquer Communism with the aid of God and a few marines! God has a hard-on for marines because we kill everything we see! He plays His games, we play ours! To show our appreciation for so much power, we keep heaven packed with fresh souls! God was here before the Marine Corps! So you can give your heart to Jesus, but your *** belongs to the Corps! Do you ladies understand?
Private Pyle, if there's one thing I hate, it's an unsecured footlocker, you know that, don't you?
Sir yes sir
If it were for dikheads like you there wouldn't be any thievery, would there?
Sir No Sir
GET DOWN FORM THERE....No let's see if there's anything missing....CRASH
HOLY SHCIDT, WHAT THE FAUK IS THAT? WHAT IS THAT PRIVATE PYLE?
Sir a jelly doughnut Sir
A jelly doughnut, how did it get up here?
Sir, i took it from the messhall Sir
Is chow allowed in the barracks Private Pyle?
Sir No Sir
Are you allowed to eat jelly doughnuts Private Pyle?
Sir No Sir
and WHY NOT?
Because I'm too heavy Sir
BECAUSE YOU'RE A DIGUSTING FAT BODY PRIVATE PYLE!!
And why did you bring it into the barracks Private Pyle
Sir, Because I was hungry Sir
Because you were hungry...Private Pyle has dishonored himself and the P'toon. I have tried to help Private Pyle, but I have failed...I have failed because you people have not help me motivate Private Pyle, so...whenever Private Pyle fux up, I will not punish him, instead I will punish you...and as I see it ladies, you owe me for one jelly doughnut...NOW GET ON YOUR FACES...open your mouth...theuy're paying for it, you eat it...READY...EXERCISE!!!

Wow, didn't mean to go through the whole scene...can you tell I was a drill sergeant a little too long...LOL

rujpett?
12-23-2005, 05:11 PM
Luke - I am your father...

NOOOOOOOOO!!!

Noodle Arm
12-23-2005, 06:13 PM
here's a few quotes from a movie a lot of people might not get. I just watched this on dvd (after buying it in the $5 bin) and I forgot just how silly and stupid it is, I laughed my butt off.

"Latrine!"

"I know a little German. He's sitting over there." (A midget dressed in lederhosen stands up and waves)

"Nick, I've tried everything: the embassy, the German government, the consulate. I even talked to the U.N. ambassador. It's no use, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm."

"Who do you favor in the Virginia Slims tournament?
In women's tennis, I always root against the heterosexual."

General Streck on the phone with the hospital: "What is the condition of Sergeant Kruger?
[pause]
Very well, let me know if there is any change in his condition.
[Hangs up]
He's dead."

The scene with the white horse is classic! :lol:

The_Dark_Knight
12-24-2005, 12:57 AM
here's a few quotes from a movie a lot of people might not get. I just watched this on dvd (after buying it in the $5 bin) and I forgot just how silly and stupid it is, I laughed my butt off.

"Latrine!"

"I know a little German. He's sitting over there." (A midget dressed in lederhosen stands up and waves)

"Nick, I've tried everything: the embassy, the German government, the consulate. I even talked to the U.N. ambassador. It's no use, I just can't bring my wife to orgasm."

"Who do you favor in the Virginia Slims tournament?
In women's tennis, I always root against the heterosexual."

General Streck on the phone with the hospital: "What is the condition of Sergeant Kruger?
[pause]
Very well, let me know if there is any change in his condition.
[Hangs up]
He's dead."

The scene with the white horse is classic! :lol:
Isn't that "Top Secret"?

Noodle Arm
12-24-2005, 10:31 AM
Isn't that "Top Secret"?

good job :up:

A lot of people haven't seen or even heard of that movie, which is a shame because it's quite funny. Plus you get to see Val Kilmer in his first movie role :lol:

dolphan117
12-25-2005, 12:14 AM
Private Pyle, if there's one thing I hate, it's an unsecured footlocker, you know that, don't you?
Sir yes sir
If it were for dikheads like you there wouldn't be any thievery, would there?
Sir No Sir
GET DOWN FORM THERE....No let's see if there's anything missing....CRASH
HOLY SHCIDT, WHAT THE FAUK IS THAT? WHAT IS THAT PRIVATE PYLE?
Sir a jelly doughnut Sir
A jelly doughnut, how did it get up here?
Sir, i took it from the messhall Sir
Is chow allowed in the barracks Private Pyle?
Sir No Sir
Are you allowed to eat jelly doughnuts Private Pyle?
Sir No Sir
and WHY NOT?
Because I'm too heavy Sir
BECAUSE YOU'RE A DIGUSTING FAT BODY PRIVATE PYLE!!
And why did you bring it into the barracks Private Pyle
Sir, Because I was hungry Sir
Because you were hungry...Private Pyle has dishonored himself and the P'toon. I have tried to help Private Pyle, but I have failed...I have failed because you people have not help me motivate Private Pyle, so...whenever Private Pyle fux up, I will not punish him, instead I will punish you...and as I see it ladies, you owe me for one jelly doughnut...NOW GET ON YOUR FACES...open your mouth...theuy're paying for it, you eat it...READY...EXERCISE!!!

Wow, didn't mean to go through the whole scene...can you tell I was a drill sergeant a little too long...LOL was that Full Metal Jacket?

dolphan117
12-25-2005, 12:15 AM
Luke - I am your father...

NOOOOOOOOO!!!

The Mor wars.

Wildbill3
12-25-2005, 01:26 AM
was that Full Metal Jacket?You had to ask that in question form? Beat your face now!:evil:

dolphan117
12-25-2005, 02:27 AM
You had to ask that in question form? Beat your face now!:evil::smackhead :smackhead :smackhead :lol:

Wildbill3
12-25-2005, 02:37 AM
:smackhead :smackhead :smackhead :lol:OH no!!! TrY it again, that push-ups for you civilian types!:evil:

dolphan117
12-25-2005, 03:04 AM
OH no!!! TrY it again, that push-ups for you civilian types!:evil::lifter: :lifter: :lifter: :lifter: :lifter: I ran out of smilies :french:

Edit-You know we could realy use a pushup smilie.

The_Dark_Knight
12-27-2005, 11:07 AM
was that Full Metal Jacket?
Yep..

We used to watch that move every time we were about to get a new group of privates from the reception station...
Very motivating!!

The_Dark_Knight
12-27-2005, 11:10 AM
good job :up:

A lot of people haven't seen or even heard of that movie, which is a shame because it's quite funny. Plus you get to see Val Kilmer in his first movie role :lol:
I still think one of the funniest parts of that movie was when the jeep "tapped" the rear end of that Ford Pinto and it exploded...

Remembering when Pintos were having problems with ruptured fule tanks...I just thought that was an awesome display of parody

Megatron
12-27-2005, 11:16 AM
I still think one of the funniest parts of that movie was when the jeep "tapped" the rear end of that Ford Pinto and it exploded...

Remembering when Pintos were having problems with ruptured fule tanks...I just thought that was an awesome display of parodyI love that movie.

PHINATIC13
12-31-2005, 04:19 PM
Sidney: Oh man shut your anorexic malnutrition tapeworm-having overdose on Dick Gregory Bohemian diet-drinking a** up. Leave me alone!

Amars
12-31-2005, 04:57 PM
She gots a great ***. AND YOU GOT YOUR HEAD ALL THE WAY UP IT.

Clark Kent
12-31-2005, 06:35 PM
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Have you ever seen a body like this before in your life?
David Decker (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0491590/): She happens to be my daughter.
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Oh. Then I guess you have.


Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Don't eat that!
Chris' Girl at Party (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0927649/): Why?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Don't you know that eating that stuff can give you very large breastS?
[looks down.]
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Oh, my God! I'm too late!

Dr. Dodd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0484842/): Why is that toy on your head?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Because if I wear it any place else, it chafes.


Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Did you know there's a guy living in our closet?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): You've seen him too?
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Who is he?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Hollyfeld.
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Why does he keep going into our closet?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Why do you keep going into our closet?
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): To get my clothes - but that's not why he goes in there.
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Of course not, he's twice your size - your clothes would never fit him.
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Yeah...
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Think before you ask these questions, Mitch. Twenty points higher than me? Thinks a big guy like that can wear his clothes?

Darlington Recruiter (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0424766/): You're Chris Knight, aren't you?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): I hope so. I'm wearing his underwear.

One of my favorites.

KingCrowder
04-03-2006, 05:01 AM
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Have you ever seen a body like this before in your life?
David Decker (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0491590/): She happens to be my daughter.
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Oh. Then I guess you have.


Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Don't eat that!
Chris' Girl at Party (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0927649/): Why?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Don't you know that eating that stuff can give you very large breastS?
[looks down.]
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Oh, my God! I'm too late!

Dr. Dodd (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0484842/): Why is that toy on your head?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Because if I wear it any place else, it chafes.


Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Did you know there's a guy living in our closet?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): You've seen him too?
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Who is he?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Hollyfeld.
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Why does he keep going into our closet?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Why do you keep going into our closet?
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): To get my clothes - but that's not why he goes in there.
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Of course not, he's twice your size - your clothes would never fit him.
Mitch (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0418909/): Yeah...
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): Think before you ask these questions, Mitch. Twenty points higher than me? Thinks a big guy like that can wear his clothes?

Darlington Recruiter (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0424766/): You're Chris Knight, aren't you?
Chris Knight (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0000174/): I hope so. I'm wearing his underwear.

One of my favorites.

Real Genius

KingCrowder
04-03-2006, 05:03 AM
Sidney: Oh man shut your anorexic malnutrition tapeworm-having overdose on Dick Gregory Bohemian diet-drinking a** up. Leave me alone!

White men can't jump

KingCrowder
04-03-2006, 05:06 AM
She gots a great ***. AND YOU GOT YOUR HEAD ALL THE WAY UP IT.

Heat