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View Full Version : Mindwarp -- A touching story of a pirate that lost weight



mor911
12-16-2005, 02:19 PM
The Mor is about to tell everyone a story that some people may not want you to hear. It's about a close friend of mine named Mindwarp.

Mindwarp was born in 1979 by the name of Mindiculous Warpapotomus. When he reached the tender age of 12, the teasing in the lovely neighborhoods of Carol City were too much... So he changed his name to the person you all know today as Mindwarp.

Becuase he had such a rough time in schools of the ghetto, Mindwarp developed a bad case of insanity. From ages 13 to 21, Mindwarp was held in 37 different mental institutions including the famous Arkham Assylum. At the age of 21, Mindwarp found a cure for his craziness... Food.

When institutionalized in Arkham, Mindwarp made a deal with a phsycotic surgeon and had 6 extra stomachs inserted into his body. Mindwarp then gained the ability to eat an uncanny amount of food. Food help sooth his crumbling mind. Food also made him a fatass. This is an old photo of Mindwarp taken back in 2000:

http://www.finheaven.com/clear.gif

He used his skills to join FinHeathen on a pirate ship pilaging cities across the globe. Eating more and more as they sailed.

In July of 2003 Mindwarp suffered from a massive fart attack that ruptured one of his stomachs, and the outer lining of his anal area. Doctors thought he may never be able to eat more that 3 turkeys again... Mindwarp was devastated.

He then vowed to go on a diet, quit the pirating biz, and work in the Web hosting business. He did just that. Loosing over 485 lbs Mindwarp turned into the success story of a blob he is today. This is a salute to Mindwarp.. And too all you other fatasses, you can do it!

In the end, doctors were able to save both Mindwarps anal area and his 7th stomach. But these days he limits his lunch trips to 4 valuemeals max.



This story was brought to you by Morwarp.com (http://morwarp.com) and sponsored by D-day's whores inc.

:mor911:

FinHeathen
12-16-2005, 02:21 PM
I heard that if you listen closely on a quiet night, you can still hear the haunting chants of his ghostly taint...

Talos
12-16-2005, 02:21 PM
Mindiculous Warpapotomus

Sounds Greek.

Buddwalk
12-16-2005, 02:23 PM
:evil: :D :evil:

Mindwarp
12-16-2005, 02:26 PM
:mindwarp:


your an ***

NJFINSFAN1
12-16-2005, 02:34 PM
Is Mor dipping into the Holiday spirit?????

Megatron
12-16-2005, 02:35 PM
:lol: Damn that's hitting below the belt.

Megatron
12-16-2005, 02:36 PM
:mindwarp:


your an ***Ouch!! Are you gonna take that crap from him Mindwarp? Stand up for yourself man!!!

CalDolFan10x14
12-16-2005, 02:36 PM
:mindwarp:


your an ***

Hit him with the ban stick! :lol: :jk:

Talos
12-16-2005, 03:25 PM
Don't worry, next time Mors car breaks down, Mindwarp will just leave his *** at home.

dolphan117
12-16-2005, 03:26 PM
Good stuff mor.

mor911
12-16-2005, 03:27 PM
Sebulba breaking down?? NEVER!

d-day
12-16-2005, 03:33 PM
Sebulba breaking down?? NEVER!


:escape:


lake minnetaca anyone... :wink:

Mindwarp
12-16-2005, 03:43 PM
Sebulba breaking down?? NEVER!



Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.


BTW Mor,

http://www.finheaven.com/clear.gif

d-day
12-16-2005, 03:48 PM
This story was brought to you by Morwarp.com (http://morwarp.com/) and sponsored by D-day's whores inc.

:mor911:



:hmmm: ...d-day's whores inc.

:eyebrow:

mor911
12-16-2005, 03:51 PM
:hmmm: ...d-day's whores inc.

:eyebrow:
Sorry bro... The Mor was supposed to keep hush hush about the brothel, but couldn't resist throwing in free advertising for brother d-day.

CalDolFan10x14
12-16-2005, 04:43 PM
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.


BTW Mor,

http://www.finheaven.com/clear.gif

:0wned: by his own material!!! :roflmao::booyeah:

Buddwalk
12-16-2005, 04:43 PM
Sorry bro... The Mor was supposed to keep hush hush about the brothel, but couldn't resist throwing in free advertising for brother d-day.

no love for buddwalks carwash :nono:

:lol:

CalDolFan10x14
12-16-2005, 04:45 PM
no love for buddwalks carwash :nono:

:lol:

Are there hot chicks working the carwash? :D

mor911
12-16-2005, 04:48 PM
How dare you use The Mor's own a-hole image against him?!?!?!

If we're lucky, we can get USA or TNT to create a made-for-TV movie and get rich selling your story Mindwarp!

Or maybe Quelonio can make a short independant film for his clas???

Jt0323
12-16-2005, 04:58 PM
that was really touching

Mindwarp
12-16-2005, 04:58 PM
but he would have to make a story about the MorWarp


Mindwarp the Pirate and his partner in crime Ninja Mor

Buddwalk
12-16-2005, 05:01 PM
Are there hot chicks working the carwash? :D

Here meet the crew :D

http://www.finheaven.com/clear.gif

NaboCane
12-16-2005, 05:03 PM
:hmmm: ...d-day's whores inc.

:eyebrow:

I knew that "night job" was suspicious. The furry hat should have been a clue.

mor911
12-16-2005, 05:05 PM
but he would have to make a story about the MorWarp


Mindwarp the Pirate and his partner in crime Ninja Mor
But Ninja Mor didn't enter the story until well into 2004...

http://www.finheaven.com/clear.gif

Quelonio
12-16-2005, 05:31 PM
How dare you use The Mor's own a-hole image against him?!?!?!

If we're lucky, we can get USA or TNT to create a made-for-TV movie and get rich selling your story Mindwarp!

Or maybe Quelonio can make a short independant film for his clas???

Mmmmmm I would have to discuss optioning his life's rights to write a script, then again, I would not know what angle to go on, his deep remorse about his addiction to food, or just the anal angle.... I think anal is good,

mor911
01-16-2007, 02:17 PM
shameless bump for good measures.

Mike13
01-16-2007, 03:44 PM
How did Mindwarp get laid?

Philter25
01-16-2007, 03:58 PM
How did Mindwarp get laid?
Marriage.

Roman529
01-16-2007, 04:01 PM
Goo stuff!!! :jt0323:

PrepDogg
01-16-2007, 08:12 PM
That story was so touching ita make-a-me cry. :boohoo:

Motion
01-16-2007, 08:23 PM
Flipper's Finest?

Noodle Arm
01-16-2007, 08:26 PM
I think anal is good,

:eek:







:tongue:

Larry Page
01-16-2007, 08:43 PM
explains alot

FinaciousOne
01-17-2007, 12:08 AM
Originally Posted by Quelonio View Post
I think anal is good,


:eek:







:tongue:

Nowdays i think it's a job requirement in Hollywood.


If they do make a movie about the pirate that lost weight, maybe there's a cameo part for this guy:
http://www.finheaven.com/clear.gif

Mike13
01-17-2007, 01:19 AM
lol "Results not typical."