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View Full Version : A question to the other parents out there...



BlitPhinFan
01-31-2006, 10:51 PM
If you have kids that are in school...

For some reason I get into this arguement with my wife everytime. Also for some unknown reason the schools in my area have scheduled 1 or 2 hour delays reguardless of the weather.

I was brought up in a scheduled evironment reguarless of whether there were delays or what not. My wife insists that if there is a 2 hour delay, then the kids should get to stay up an extra 2 hours. I believe that they should go to bed at their normal bed time so their sleep schedule doesn't get messed up.

Am I being too strict or is she being too lenient, perhaps a combination of both?

I was brought up in a one parent family(my mom) and she was brought up in a two parent family. I work, she doesn't(don't get me wrong she works, but has no truely set schedule being a stay at home mom, her schedule revolves around the kids school schedule).

I just don't agree with the kids having a flex schedule. I think they need some sort of set structure until they are old enough to decide for themselves. Am I being too old fashion?

Edit: My children are ages 6 and 8 if that helps.

Buddwalk
01-31-2006, 10:55 PM
If you have kids that are in school...

For some reason I get into this arguement with my wife everytime. Also for some unknown reason the schools in my area have scheduled 1 or 2 hour delays reguardless of the weather.

I was brought up in a scheduled evironment reguarless of whether there were delays or what not. My wife insists that if there is a 2 hour delay, then the kids should get to stay up an extra 2 hours. I believe that they should go to bed at their normal bed time so their sleep schedule doesn't get messed up.

Am I being too strict or is she being too lenient, perhaps a combination of both?

I was brought up in a one parent family(my mom) and she was brought up in a two parent family. I work, she doesn't(don't get me wrong she works, but has no truely set schedule being a stay at hime mom, her schedule revolves around the kids school schedule).

I just don't agree with the kids having a flex schedule. I think they need some sort of set structure until they are old enough to decide for themselves. Am I being too old fashion?


No your right on this one, make the kids go to bed on a regular schedule and just wake them up an hour later then usual...they'll have more sleep in them and thank you for it

BlitPhinFan
01-31-2006, 10:58 PM
No your right on this one, make the kids go to bed on a regular schedule and just wake them up an hour later then usual...they'll have more sleep in them and thank you for it
Thanks Budd. It just makes sense to do it that way. For some dang reason I always lose though(probably because I am always the bad guy in that situation in my kids eyes) butI feel it will do them more harm than good in the long run(doing it her way).

wpgfishfan
01-31-2006, 11:34 PM
I have 2 kids and during the week they go to bed between 8:30-9:00 every school night

On the weekends they stay up late and if I'm home alone I let the old one (6) stay up with me to watch whatever movie I watch. Sometimes she is up to 11pm and then crashes in my arms until I put her in her bed

BlitPhinFan
01-31-2006, 11:50 PM
I have 2 kids and during the week they go to bed between 8:30-9:00 every school night

On the weekends they stay up late and if I'm home alone I let the old one (6) stay up with me to watch whatever movie I watch. Sometimes she is up to 11pm and then crashes in my arms until I put her in her bed

I must be even more lenient than I thought. During school nights my kids go to bed at 10pm... unless of course the wife gets involved when there are scheduled delays... then it coud be as late as mid-night if I let her have her way completely. On weekends and non-schoool nights she tries to let them stay up as late as they want. With my kids that can end up being as early as 1AM or as late as 4AM... it just drives me nuts.

HansMojo
02-01-2006, 03:06 AM
I must be even more lenient than I thought. During school nights my kids go to bed at 10pm... unless of course the wife gets involved when there are scheduled delays... then it coud be as late as mid-night if I let her have her way completely. On weekends and non-schoool nights she tries to let them stay up as late as they want. With my kids that can end up being as early as 1AM or as late as 4AM... it just drives me nuts.

4am!!!? It’s none of my business, but since you asked….Man that’s too late under just about any circumstance. Even 1 am is too late for kids that age. I’ve seen research that shows that any sleep after midnight has only about half the value of sleep before midnight (even if they sleep in). It’s just the way the body works. I’ve also read that staying up late when young leads to REM problems down the road. For me, peace in the family is the most important thing, but you really gotta put your foot down there…IMHO.

Now as for the other thing, where they get a little mixed up for school scheduled delays, I wouldn’t be as rigid if it was me. It’s not happening all the time after all. I mean don’t get me wrong. My wife and I are both strong believers in structure and schedules for our kids (age 4 and 6) and we always try and get them to sleep before 9 (10 at the latest and that is rare)…but there are always those unavoidable circumstances that come up and absolute rigidity just isn’t realistic. Peace in the family is the most important thing IMHO. If it were me, I’d compromise with the wife and say fine, they can stay up for scheduled school delays, but the weekend 1-4 am thing should stop immediately. That seems like a fair compromise to me. Coming to an agreeable compromise is important since you are both their parents. If I were you, I’d put together some research that shows the importance of sleep for kids and in a non confrontational manner (as much as possible anyway), present it to her and ask for the compromise. Good luck with whatever you decide though and let us know how it goes.

Agent51
02-01-2006, 03:17 AM
I must be even more lenient than I thought. During school nights my kids go to bed at 10pm... unless of course the wife gets involved when there are scheduled delays... then it coud be as late as mid-night if I let her have her way completely. On weekends and non-schoool nights she tries to let them stay up as late as they want. With my kids that can end up being as early as 1AM or as late as 4AM... it just drives me nuts.

Dude that is WAY too late for 6 and 8 year olds. I speak from experience cuz both my parents were alcoholics and literall closed the bars every night when I lived at home so I basically raised my younger bro and sis. 10 or later on a school night is too late for kids that young, delays or not, and 1-4am is just insane. Not questioning your parenting or anything, just speaking from experience raising younger kids (my brother is 5 years younger than me, sister is 10 years younger, raised em from the time I was 11 til I was 18), its just too late, it causes crankyness and lack of sleep hurts development and they will be under rested and everything.

HysterikiLL
02-01-2006, 03:32 AM
Eye got liddle a mount ov sleep az a k1d and I tirned 0ut fighn. Don't mayk such a b1g deale.

LtDan
02-01-2006, 03:36 AM
My kids are 10 and 13. I would let them stay up later

unifiedtheory
02-01-2006, 04:05 AM
Eye got liddle a mount ov sleep az a k1d and I tirned 0ut fighn. Don't mayk such a b1g deale.:sidelol:

FinFan72
02-01-2006, 10:09 AM
Eye got liddle a mount ov sleep az a k1d and I tirned 0ut fighn. Don't mayk such a b1g deale.
:sidelol:

GRAPEAPE
02-01-2006, 10:16 AM
I myself can barely stay up past 11:00 anymore. 3-4 hours of sleep for a Kid cannot be good for them. I think your doing the right thing trying to get them to go to bed earlier. I remember staying up til 3-4 in the morning in college and going to class in the morning like a zombie and not learning a thing. . Your children may be the same way.

UltraDol-Fan
02-01-2006, 10:29 AM
wow, I had to got to bed a 7:30, no sh** until I was 10.

Mindwarp
02-01-2006, 10:32 AM
ok my wife and me are the oppiste of you and your wife. I always belived in staying up how ever late you wanted, HOWEVER, I soon learned that the kids behave and grow mentaly better when put on a schedual. They need to stick to the schedual. Not only will it help them now, but it will help them later in life and wont be late getting everywhere.

SCall13
02-01-2006, 10:33 AM
If you have kids that are in school...

For some reason I get into this arguement with my wife everytime. Also for some unknown reason the schools in my area have scheduled 1 or 2 hour delays reguardless of the weather.

I was brought up in a scheduled evironment reguarless of whether there were delays or what not. My wife insists that if there is a 2 hour delay, then the kids should get to stay up an extra 2 hours. I believe that they should go to bed at their normal bed time so their sleep schedule doesn't get messed up.

Am I being too strict or is she being too lenient, perhaps a combination of both?

I was brought up in a one parent family(my mom) and she was brought up in a two parent family. I work, she doesn't(don't get me wrong she works, but has no truely set schedule being a stay at home mom, her schedule revolves around the kids school schedule).

I just don't agree with the kids having a flex schedule. I think they need some sort of set structure until they are old enough to decide for themselves. Am I being too old fashion?

Edit: My children are ages 6 and 8 if that helps.

Your children are the same age as mine. I have an 8 year old daughter and a 6 year old son.
I lean toward agreeing with you. A schedule is good. But on the other hand, it wouldn't be a bad idea to maybe give them an extra hour on those nights. An hour shouldn't hurt the pattern too bad and there will be a little compromise for both you and your wife.

BlitPhinFan
02-01-2006, 10:48 AM
Thanks for all the great input everyone.

I'm going to try to dig up some papers/info on how sleep affects learning and see if I can at least get the weekend and non-school night problem resolved first. That's the one that bothers me the most.