PDA

View Full Version : France quotes



iceblizzard69
03-16-2003, 01:10 PM
France quotes (not derogotory because they make fun of their army, and don't make fun of their people!!)


" I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me"

General Patton

...................................................................................

"Going to war without France is like going deerhunting without your accordian"

Norman Schwartztoph

...................................................................................

"We can stand here like the French or we can do something about it"

Marge Simpson

...................................................................................

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee"

Regis Philbin

...................................................................................

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq, afterall the French would'nt help us get the Germans out of France"

Jay Leno

...................................................................................

"The last time France asked for more proof, it came marching into Paris under a German flag"

David Letterman

dolfan06
03-16-2003, 01:33 PM
Originally posted by iceblizzard69
France quotes (not derogotory because they make fun of their army, and don't make fun of their people!!)


" I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me"

General Patton

...................................................................................

"Going to war without France is like going deerhunting without your accordian"

Norman Schwartztoph

...................................................................................

"We can stand here like the French or we can do something about it"

Marge Simpson

...................................................................................

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee"

Regis Philbin

...................................................................................

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq, afterall the French would'nt help us get the Germans out of France"

Jay Leno

...................................................................................

"The last time France asked for more proof, it came marching into Paris under a German flag"

David Letterman now i don't want to start up another thread like the other one, but why were people giving LCP so much grief? these are the same as the ones he posted:

Q: What do you call a group of 100,000 Frenchman with their hands in the
air?
A: "The French army, of course."

Q: How many Frenchmen does it take to defend Paris?
A: Nobody knows & no Frenchman has ever tried.

Q: How do you stop a French tank?
A: By shooting the soldier pushing it.

Q: Why does the new French Navy have glass-bottom boats?
A: So they can see the old French Navy....

dolfan06
03-16-2003, 01:36 PM
"We can stand here like the French or we can do something about it"

now this one is definately about the people!

dolfan06
03-16-2003, 01:39 PM
Jay Leno, a few summers ago, said:
"France is now being hit by an extreme heat-wave, so the French government
is advising its citizens to "stay indoors and do nothing". "You know, like
they did in WWII

and this is from LCP's!

dolfan06
03-16-2003, 01:42 PM
i don't think these quotes and jokes aren't any more insulting than the rest of the world saying that america has 1/10 the population and causes 1/3 of the waste in the world!

Miafan
03-16-2003, 01:50 PM
"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq, afterall the French would'nt help us get the Germans out of France"

Hahaha :lol:

t2thejz
03-16-2003, 01:54 PM
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Miafan
03-16-2003, 02:19 PM
http://www.francesucks.com/

Barbarian
03-16-2003, 02:58 PM
Miafan, thanks for the link... I'm making some orders from there. :)

iceblizzard69
03-16-2003, 03:05 PM
Originally posted by dolfan06
now this one is definately about the people!

It is more about their army in my mind.

I don't have a problem at all with French army jokes, I actually thought most of LCPs jokes were pretty funny. The only one I thought that was a little mean was "Where do you find 60 million jokes? Answer: France." I wonder what France's jokes about the USA are though, I bet those are really harsh.

Barbarian
03-16-2003, 03:14 PM
Originally posted by iceblizzard69
I wonder what France's jokes about the USA are though, I bet those are really harsh.

eh... I heard a few when I was over there and while I can't recall any right off the top of my head, I recall that a couple were "snicker-worthy".(by the way, southern france is really nice, but if you ever visit, avoid Paris like the plague, it's a dirty, smelly, nasty city but cities like Toulon and Cannes are pretty nice actually.)

dolfan06
03-16-2003, 03:39 PM
Originally posted by Barbarian
eh... I heard a few when I was over there and while I can't recall any right off the top of my head, I recall that a couple were "snicker-worthy".(by the way, southern france is really nice, but if you ever visit, avoid Paris like the plague, it's a dirty, smelly, nasty city but cities like Toulon and Cannes are pretty nice actually.) :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

Barbarian
03-16-2003, 04:32 PM
Originally posted by dolfan06
:rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

What? If you have a point, please make it.

dolfan06
03-16-2003, 05:12 PM
Originally posted by Barbarian
What? If you have a point, please make it.
How so? People are taking many liberties with taking direct stabs at French people, not just their government and military.

this is my point! you didn't make the statement, but do we have to have a censor on this board and have some body read each and every post before its posted? some things are funny to some, some don't find it funny! if you don't find it funny the best thing to do is ignore it! opinioms are like @$$holes, everybody has one!
;) :tongue:

dolphan39
04-15-2003, 02:03 PM
some more (may repeat):

"France has neither winter nor summer nor morals. Apart from these drawbacks it is a fine country. France has usually been governed byprostitutes." - Mark Twain

"I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me." - General George S. Patton

"Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." - Donald Rumsfeld

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it." - Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure" - Jacques Chirac, President of France

"As far as France is concerned, you're right." - Rush Limbaugh

"The only time France wants us to go to war is when the German Army is sitting in Paris sipping coffee." - Regis Philbin

"The French are a smallish, monkey-looking bunch and not dressed any better, on average, than the citizens of Baltimore. True, you can sit outside in Paris and drink little cups of coffee, but why this is more stylish than sitting inside and drinking large glasses of whiskey I don't know." - P.J O'Rourke (1989)

"You know, the French remind me a little bit of an aging actress of the 1940s who was still trying to dine out on her looks but doesn't have the face for it." - John McCain, U.S. Senator from Arizona

"You know why the French don't want to bomb Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is French, people." - Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get the Germans out of France!" - Jay Leno

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag." - David Letterman

How many Frenchmen does it take to change a light bulb? One - he holds the bulb and all of Europe revolves around him.

Next time there's a war in Europe, the loser has to keep France.