View Full Version : *HOT* Dolphins Free Agent Signing

03-21-2010, 09:33 PM
Today the Dolphins announced their latest Free Agent signing. Unexpectedly Sock Monkey signs a long-term deal, terms were not disclosed. It is believed the deal was only possible due to 2010 being an uncapped year.

Sock Monkey could fill several holes on the Dolphins roster; but it is expected he will play one of the "Skill" positions most likely Wide Receiver, where he is expected to compete with last year's #1 WR Ted Ginn to be Chad Henne's primary target.

In fact, during a private workout Sock Monkey displayed better hands than Ginn even though he doesn't actually have any. (Sock Monkey that is...) :ponder:

Sock Monkey was coming off an injury suffered late last year. However Sock Monkey showed his true grit to the entire league and national TV audience by only missing a couple of plays receiving multiple stitches on the sideline before returning to the fray against the advice of coaches/seamstress.

Sock Monkey appears to be back to his normal "Plush" self after nearly having the stuffing knocked out of him on several occasions last year.

It is widely known that the trifecta of Parcells, Ireland & Sparano have had their eye on Sock Monkey for quite some time; but simply couldn't afford him - until now.

An undisclosed source was quoted as saying:

"Sock Monkey is definitely a Parcells-type player. He easily meets the size/speed/versatility requirement. He is certainly a team player. He keeps his mouth shut. Has the work ethic they are looking for, is certainly a leader in the locker room :hi5:; and Sock Monkey also brings certain intangibles that will pay big dividends in those late season, cold weather games. He's a playmaker; and quite simply, he was the best player available on the market - hands down." "He's a cool customer. He never seems to get flustered - and if he did, you couldn't tell. His expression never changes regardless of the pressure."

The Sock Monkey signing is even more important due to his versatility.
This takes away a huge amount of pressure on next month's draft allowing the Dolphins to draft the best player available instead of drafting for need.

Sock Monkey should help fill the leadership void from the departure of Joey Porter to Arizona (Notice they have the same eyes) :tumbleweed:

ESPN noted: "The Dolphins bold signing of Sock Monkey has to make them the odds on favorite to not only win the AFC East, but also puts them in the pole position for a serious run at the Super Bowl." :woot:

As usual the Dolphins did not hold a press conference to announce the signing; but did release this photo. :cdf:


SERIOUSLY: This was for FUN folks. Today was my 14th wedding anniversary, and this Sock Monkey was my present!

03-21-2010, 09:34 PM
Dude why do you guys do this. This will be moving to spam in 5 4 3 2

03-21-2010, 09:35 PM
Congrats on the anniversary!

03-21-2010, 09:35 PM
why does "Sprockets" immediately come to mind....

Congrats on 14 years!

03-21-2010, 09:38 PM

03-21-2010, 09:39 PM
SPAM then BAN!!!:spamattac:banhim2:

04-04-2010, 05:18 PM

I don't get why people have to be so serious all the time. This off season has been relatively sleepy, and this was just for fun! I haven't had a laugh like this in a long time.

Congrats on the 14 years. LOVE your present. :lol: