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View Full Version : Fun Thread: We list things that are better than Replacement Refs



tylerdolphin
09-25-2012, 01:52 AM
A screen door on a submarine.
A ride on the Hindenburg
Cruising on the Titanic
Sending your kid to the Second Mile camp with Sandusky
Having Casey Anthony as a babysitter
Watching The Dark Knight Rises in Colorado.
AIDS
Jets fans
Nuclear holocaust

You guys get the drift. Add in your own.

Flip Tanneflop
09-25-2012, 02:00 AM
Sharting yourself in a room full of people

Riding on a 16 hour plane flight beside NYJunc and mistakingly disclosing you are a huge football fan before discovering who he is

Catching any of the STDs that Kim Kardashian gave Reggie Bush

Living in Cleveland

Supporting Penn St football

tylerdolphin
09-25-2012, 02:02 AM
Charlie Sheen's career
Vince Young's IQ
Stephen Hawking's 40 time.

dahlmarino
09-25-2012, 02:04 AM
WWE Wrestling! Oh, are we talking better or more believable? Seriously, the only thing that game was missing was a cheap shot with folding chairs and an appearance from Chris Jericho.

Flip Tanneflop
09-25-2012, 02:05 AM
Drafting Pat White

Passing on Matt Ryan and instead taking a LT

Having Chad Henne play QB for your team

Watching TakeoSpikesNeck's web show

Hiring Tony Sparano to your coacing staff

J. David Wannyheimer
09-25-2012, 02:06 AM
Riding on a 16 hour plane flight beside NYJunc and mistakingly disclosing you are a huge football fan before discovering who he is


I'm sorry, but I'll take the replacement refs instead of that one.

tylerdolphin
09-25-2012, 02:08 AM
Cromartie's contraceptive skills.

---------- Post added at 02:08 AM ---------- Previous post was at 02:06 AM ----------

Nickelback

Flip Tanneflop
09-25-2012, 02:10 AM
Passing a kidney stone

Running barefoot in the desert

Kanye West's latest album

Mogwai
09-25-2012, 02:10 AM
Bending over to pick something up while Sparano celebrates a field goal
Being Roger Goodell's conscience
Watching Rex Ryan hump some dude's foot
Joining Sam Bacile on a vacation to Egypt
Hooking up with a Kardashian (not Kim)
Brandon Weeden's HOF prospects

MP-Omnis
09-25-2012, 02:15 AM
Things that are better than the replacement refs:


Deion Sanders's rap career.
Deion Sanders's TV analyst career.
Being a vase in Brandon Marshall's house
Ted Ginn's hands
Lebron James's hairline
Vince Young's credit score.

Flip Tanneflop
09-25-2012, 02:16 AM
The decision

Jason Bay's contract

Returning glasses to Nicole Simpson

JC
09-25-2012, 02:32 AM
Communism

Jumping out of a plane without a parachute

Getting punched in the face by Wolverine

Holding a nail for Thor

Getting "gate raped" in the airport security line

Tom Cruise's religious beliefs

Mel Gibson's sanity

Masturbating with sandpaper

Getting blindsided by Ray Lewis

Evander Holyfield's other ear

Ozzy Guillen's english skills

MP-Omnis
09-25-2012, 02:35 AM
Ozzie Guillen's english
John Jerry's sex appeal
Headcrabs
Golden Tate's honesty
Dan Carpenter's aim
Jay Cutler's pancreas
Being Macaulay Culkin as an adult
Hopping off your jet ski in the Gulf of Mexico.



edit: OMG you tee'd me on Ozzie. :lol:

Mogwai
09-25-2012, 02:36 AM
Your girlfriend forcing you to watch the Emmys
Starring in low budget movies set in a desert
Having Dave Wannstedt offer you a mustache ride
Hooking up with McKayla and getting the not impressed face
Eating skittles while wearing a hoodie

tylerdolphin
09-25-2012, 02:41 AM
Being a Jew in the 1940s

MP-Omnis
09-25-2012, 02:51 AM
Being a crumb in Andy Reid's mustache.

TheWalrus
09-25-2012, 03:01 AM
Getting your nuts bit off by a laplander.

TheWalrus
09-25-2012, 03:12 AM
Learning that the cure for cancer is DPing Susan Boyle with a close family relative.
Being caught with a Richard Simmons workout video in Saudi Arabia.
Having the juice of a fresh jalapeno poured into your dick.
George Lucas. Just sort of generally. And also pinworms, these awful creatures that have sex in your lower intestine and then lay eggs on your ass at night.
Being forced to watch Avatar on a continuous loop.
Getting stuck on a deserted island where the only liquid available to drink is Rosie O'Donnell's ejaculate.

TheWalrus
09-25-2012, 03:30 AM
Getting caught masturbating by your mother and blowing a load on your own face in surprise.

JC
09-25-2012, 03:36 AM
Learning that the cure for cancer is DPing Susan Boyle with a close family relative.
Being caught with a Richard Simmons workout video in Saudi Arabia.
Having the juice of a fresh jalapeno poured into your dick.
George Lucas. Just sort of generally. And also pinworms, these awful creatures that have sex in your lower intestine and then lay eggs on your ass at night.
Being forced to watch Avatar on a continuous loop.
Getting stuck on a deserted island where the only liquid available to drink is Rosie O'Donnell's ejaculate.


****, stop it! Where do you come up with this?

denn34
09-25-2012, 04:58 AM
9169a little bit of fun

fatkirstyalley
09-25-2012, 08:36 AM
Anything Michael Bay touches
Low fat Ice cream
Having to tell your wife that you have a crush on this guy you work with
Hamburgers without bacon
Chad Hennes haircut
Getting caught masterbating by your grandpa...and finishing anyway

Vaark
09-25-2012, 09:23 AM
*Having your toe in Rex's mouth while you're ****ing Michelle
*Being inducted into the F/HOF by Joe Namath
*Passing on Aaron Rodgers for a p/t SEC RB who spent half of his career on IR
*Being a straight masseuse and getting an outcall from John Travalta
*Being Nick Satan on a family vacation to DisneyWorld and failing the height restrictions to get on the best rides.
*Being poor and forced to eat Chinese dog food.
*Learning you have a serious illness while married to Newt Gingrich

MP-Omnis
09-25-2012, 09:33 AM
Being James Gandolfiini's CPAP machine.

SuperMarksBros.
09-25-2012, 10:57 AM
Being a dove bar in a room where Bill Parcells is exercising
Being a golf cart around a Pat White throwing drill
Being the guy that lost chunks of his mortgage payment chasing the Packers after a tough weekend of losses

denn34
09-25-2012, 12:06 PM
9172

Flip Tanneflop
09-25-2012, 12:12 PM
Tim Tebow's QB skills

Legadu Naanee's hands

Being an alter boy at the catholic church

Fail forward fast

Dez Bryant's mother's personal hygiene

dahlmarino
09-25-2012, 01:11 PM
Learning that the cure for cancer is DPing Susan Boyle with a close family relative.
Being caught with a Richard Simmons workout video in Saudi Arabia.
Having the juice of a fresh jalapeno poured into your dick.
George Lucas. Just sort of generally. And also pinworms, these awful creatures that have sex in your lower intestine and then lay eggs on your ass at night.
Being forced to watch Avatar on a continuous loop.
Getting stuck on a deserted island where the only liquid available to drink is Rosie O'Donnell's ejaculate.

I honestly don't know whether you should be writing scripts for movies or if you just need some serious therapy sessions. It really could go either way.

TheWalrus
09-25-2012, 02:54 PM
I honestly don't know whether you should be writing scripts for movies or if you just need some serious therapy sessions. It really could go either way.

Can't it be both?

dolpns13
09-25-2012, 03:28 PM
I was going to say, taking a dump, but the refs do a fine job of that every Sunday

AquaInferno
09-25-2012, 04:10 PM
Going down on Aunt Flo's hairy box
Abstinence
Crackheads
Barry Horowitz

Fins_of_Fury
09-25-2012, 05:22 PM
Finheaven after a close loss to a division rival...

Dbest
09-25-2012, 05:26 PM
mike vicks clover patch :chuckle:

Blake the great
09-25-2012, 06:46 PM
pre-ejaculation
maurice clarett's NFL career
Dan Carpenter
Justin Beiber
The show "Queer eye for the Straight Guy"

silverfin
09-25-2012, 06:48 PM
Riding on a 16 hour plane flight beside NYJunc and mistakingly disclosing you are a huge football fan before discovering who he is

We have a winner :lol2:

Serious Fun Guy
09-25-2012, 06:55 PM
Ding Dong

Who is it?

FOOTBALL

IT'S SERIOUS FUN!!!!

Bumpus
09-25-2012, 06:56 PM
- Pay toilets in a diarrhea ward.
- Megan Fox's acting skills.
- Making the mistake of opening a thread about Matt Moore a few minutes ago.
- A steaming pile of **** right in the center of your bowl of Cheerios.
- Josh Gibson's MLB career.
- Juan Huron's NFL career.
- Standing in front of a tank at Tiananmen Square.
- Being the ref at a Special Olympics basketball game.
- Publically eating a juicy hamburger in India.
- Big East football.
- The 1986-1987 Los Angeles Clippers
- Opening a chain of Taco Bell's in Mexico.
- Entering a spelling bee against a 15-year-old Korean kid.
- Dropping the soap in prison.
- Mistakenly sending a dick pic to your grandma.
- Moving in next door to the Manson family.
- Calling ahead to make reservations at McDonalds.
- Bringing sand along with you to the beach.
- Painting "FREE CANDY" on the side of your panel van.
- Trying to teach Arnold Schwarzenegger how to say "California"
- Being Roger Clemons' personal trainer.
- Japanese mail-order brides.
- Purchasing property in NOLA's lower 9th ward.
- Serving as Sarah Palin's running mate in 2016.
- Gargling with razor blades.
- Having a consultation with Jack Kevorkian.
- Teaching a blonde to read.
- Working as the "quality control inspector" at a dildoe factory.
- Moderating threads on FH after a loss.
- Being Jon-Benet Ramsey's nanny.
- Spilling a full beer.
- Getting stranded on a deserted island with Roseanne.
- Asking a homeless guy for change.
- Eating a corn dog on Fire Island.
- Spending quality time with your mother-in-law.
- When picking your date up, asking her dad for a condom.
- Drinking from a fire hose.
- Finally completing your collection of Zamphir albums.
- Organizing belly button lint.
- Pissing on an electric fence.
- Backpacking through Iran while waving the stars & stripes.
- Giving your girlfriend a credit card.
- Renting the movie Yentl.
- Tapping a fat chick, even though your buddies are in the next room.
- Stalking Nancy Reagan.
- Telling a republican, in detail, your ideas about gun control.
- Telling a democrat, in detail, your ideas about tax cuts for the rich as a means to generate jobs.
- Sending 29 cents a day to Sally Struthers.
- Dedicating you life to the search for the Loch Ness Monster.
- Telling little kids that you beat up Santa Claus last night.
- Going to see Great White perform live at a club.




... I may have missed a few things.

AdamC13
09-25-2012, 07:47 PM
There are some deeply disturbed people on these forums...:lol:

-swimming with the seals around South Africa's Seal Island
-getting stuck in an elevator for 8 that only plays Celine Dion
-getting a foot massage and finding out it is Rex Ryan
-finding out Mark Sanchez has been traded to Miami and is the new starting QB

tylerdolphin
09-25-2012, 07:49 PM
Realizing she has a penis.

zackmandude63
09-25-2012, 09:04 PM
http://www.finheaven.com/clear.gif

silverfin
09-25-2012, 09:06 PM
Accompanying Rex Ryan on a VIP tour of Dr. Scholl's factory