View Full Version : Starting a New Religion

05-28-2004, 11:44 PM
From the book of Jimmy Pop

These are first and foremost beleafs. There will be more added. I am curious how many followers I need to not pay taxes anymore. The main part of my religion is I will never ask any of the beleavers for any money, and our main objective is to end the PC bullsh!t that plauges our country. We will insult everyone, so no one can whine.

Alright now boys and girls we've got another story for you now!
We want to introduce to you another friend of the Bible!

If I were God there would be no explicit sex on T.V.
Like little Opie eating pie when he made it with Aunt Bea

If I were God thou shall not worship false Billy Idols
And thou shall add the Book Of Flavor Flav to the Bible
Thou shall make fun of Hindus thou shall not make a "Speed 2"
If I were God that's what I'd do Heavens no

If I were God I'd get a bunch of slaves to do everything
Norwegian lesbians that feed me grapes and know how to sing

If I were God thou shall not wear tube socks with Flip-Flops
Thou shall sit and thou shall spin thou shall even wife swap
Thou shall resist the Olsen Twins thou shall not cut "Footloose"
If I were God that's what I'd do Heavens no

So vote for me for Savior and you'll go to Heaven
Your lame duck Lord is like Kevin Spacey in "Seven"
With creepy threats of H-E-Double-Hockey-Stick
You just can't teach an old God new tricks
Just sport some crummy "holier than thou" facade
Yeah that's what I would do if I were God