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Thread: POFO Anything Goes Thread. ((Warning do not enter if you can't handle fire))

  1. -2131
    LouPhinFan's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Locke
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    So because the DUI rate is so high here in Albuquerque, the city offers free cab rides every night from 9 pm until last call. Nina and I decided that we should take advantage and spend New Years Eve bar-hopping since we had never done it before. Never again. I got tossed out of a bar because some douchebag grabbed my wife, and I pushed him when he wouldn't let go and leave. Apparently the bouncer only saw the last part and wouldn't listen to me when I tried to explain. The people we went to meet ended up bouncing early and left us by ourselves. So we run into this girl who took one of my classes a few semesters back. After the bars start closing down, we get invited to an after party at her place, so we go. I then proceed to drink more Jaeger than any one person ever should. When I wake up, Nina and I are in the girl's bed with her, and I'm spooning a German Shepard. There wasn't any funny business, but apparently in the middle of the night Nina forgot where we were and stripped down to her underwear like she does when we sleep at home. So of course now everyone thinks we had a menage a tois with this 24 year old. I have no memory of how we ended up in her bed, I'm missing a sock and my belt, and I'm STILL getting random texts asking what happened. This is why the only New Years parties we go to in the future are at someone's house. I'm getting too old for this ****...
    Reason #43 NOT TO DRINK JAEGERMEISTER

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  2. -2132
    LouPhinFan's Avatar
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    Locke's drunken 3-way reminded me of a funny story from my grad-school days (in the early 2000s). Let's just say this was back in my "much less Christian" days.

    I shared an apartment in downtown Louisville with 2 other guys and let me tell you this place was a pantie-dropper. There were very few apartments at that time in the main downtown business district. Our apartment had awesome views of the downtown buildings with around 1800 square feet. Let's just say the views got me my wife...
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    One of my roommates was one of those spikey-haired buff kinda guys. All he had to do was glance at a female and she'd practically climb into his bed. I was both sickening and amazing at the same time. His problem was that he didn't always pick the most "sane" women to use his mutant power on. One time he started dating this stripper. She was ok looking, nothing really outstanding but he always wanted to date one. One Saturday night we're all partying, and I've had enough so I go to bed. The next morning I wake up and go into the living room where a couple of our buddies who had crashed on our couches and my other roommate were watching TV. I sit down with them and eat breakfast. The tell me that Nathan and his stripper girlfriend had one of her friends show up last night and then the 3 of them disappeared into Nathan's room.

    All of a sudden here comes Nathan walking out into the livingroom in a daze with nothing but his gym shorts on. Dude looked like he was in shock. We asked him what was wrong. He said "just go crack the door to my bedroom and look in". We did.

    There were 2 buck naked chicks passed out on the bed and a couple of used condoms on the floor. A half dozen beer bottles littered the room. Seriously it looked like a rock star's hotel room or something.

    We came back in and asked him how it was. He of course gave us details (yes he had fun). But then just said "That's my first 3 way. I don't know what to do with myself now. Do I eat breakfast or stare off into space? I honestly don't know what to do with myself." (I'm paraphrasing of course)

    It was like he was wondering around the tornado devastated home of his sex life, unsure what to do at that moment or where to go. Funny stuff.




    It was funny until a month later when that crazy stripper chick got drunk one night and craved "HELLO" in the hood of his car for no apparent reason. Also wasn't funny when a few months after that Nathan used his mutant power on a not so cute girl in town from Ohio for the Kentucky Derby and he got her pregnant on a supposed to be one-night-stand.

    With great power comes great responsibility I suppose.

  3. -2133
    Locke's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by LouPhinFan
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    Reason #43 NOT TO DRINK JAEGERMEISTER
    I love Jaeger. I just normally control my intake much more effectively. I've only been conscious again for like 4 hours, though. This is why I normally stick to beer...
    Last edited by Locke; 01-02-2013 at 09:21 AM.

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    If I could take your pain and frame it, and hang it on my wall,
    maybe you would never have to hurt again...


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  4. -2134
    Dolphins9954's Avatar
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    "Politics is the Art of Looking for Trouble, Finding it Everywhere, Diagnosing it Incorrectly, and Applying the Wrong Remedies"

  5. -2135
    Dolphins9954's Avatar
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    Since we're on the topic of 3-ways. I'm totally down with 2 girls and me every time. But I don't think I could do the 2 guys and a girl thing. I just keep thinking Ghostbusters "crossing the streams" ****.

  6. -2136
    Locke's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Dolphins9954
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    Since we're on the topic of 3-ways. I'm totally down with 2 girls and me every time. But I don't think I could do the 2 guys and a girl thing. I just keep thinking Ghostbusters "crossing the streams" ****.
    Devil's threesome? Yeah, not so awesome...

  7. -2137
    MoFinz's Avatar
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    Happy New Year My Bitches!

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    Fat, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life

  8. -2138
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  9. -2139
    MoFinz's Avatar
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  10. -2140
    NY8123's Avatar
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    Originally Posted by Dolphins9954
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    Since we're on the topic of 3-ways. I'm totally down with 2 girls and me every time. But I don't think I could do the 2 guys and a girl thing. I just keep thinking Ghostbusters "crossing the streams" ****.
    It's only gay if the dick ends up in you, don't be scared.
    "Half the lies they tell about me aren't true." ~ Yogi Berra

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