The decision
Jason Bay's contract
Returning glasses to Nicole Simpson
The decision
Jason Bay's contract
Returning glasses to Nicole Simpson
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Tebow cried
Cam lied
Trees died
LSU tried
ROLL TIDE!!!!!


Communism
Jumping out of a plane without a parachute
Getting punched in the face by Wolverine
Holding a nail for Thor
Getting "gate raped" in the airport security line
Tom Cruise's religious beliefs
Mel Gibson's sanity
Masturbating with sandpaper
Getting blindsided by Ray Lewis
Evander Holyfield's other ear
Ozzy Guillen's english skills
- Ozzie Guillen's english
- John Jerry's sex appeal
- Headcrabs
- Golden Tate's honesty
- Dan Carpenter's aim
- Jay Cutler's pancreas
- Being Macaulay Culkin as an adult
- Hopping off your jet ski in the Gulf of Mexico.
edit: OMG you tee'd me on Ozzie.
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Your girlfriend forcing you to watch the Emmys
Starring in low budget movies set in a desert
Having Dave Wannstedt offer you a mustache ride
Hooking up with McKayla and getting the not impressed face
Eating skittles while wearing a hoodie
Being a Jew in the 1940s
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Learning that the cure for cancer is DPing Susan Boyle with a close family relative.
Being caught with a Richard Simmons workout video in Saudi Arabia.
Having the juice of a fresh jalapeno poured into your dick.
George Lucas. Just sort of generally. And also pinworms, these awful creatures that have sex in your lower intestine and then lay eggs on your ass at night.
Being forced to watch Avatar on a continuous loop.
Getting stuck on a deserted island where the only liquid available to drink is Rosie O'Donnell's ejaculate.
Getting caught masturbating by your mother and blowing a load on your own face in surprise.


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Originally Posted by TheWalrus
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****, stop it! Where do you come up with this?
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