Are you gonna drink that?
A married couple is playing a round of golf on vacation. The husband tees off and slices the ball through a window of a house lining the fairway. The couple sheepishly approach the house to apologize and pay for the damages.
They knock on the door, and hear "Come in." They enter to find a man in robes seated on the couch and broken glass scattered on the floor.
The husband begins to studder out and apology, but he is cut off..
"The glass at your feet is the shattered remains on my former prison. I have been trapped within that lamp for the past 1,000 years. For freeing my from my bonds, I shall grant you two wishes."
The husband points out that genies are supposed to give three wishes.
"True. But, I am no longer bound by the lamp. As a reward for setting me free, I will grant you two wishes, but the final wish belongs to me."
The husband immediately wishes for his PGA Tour card. His wife slaps him in the head. He tries to calm his wife by explaining that he'll be able to make tons of cash on tour.
The irate wife announces that she'll take the second wish. She wishes for a fully staffed mansion on both coasts, in Paris, in Rome, and in Rio.
"For the third wish ... I wish to have sex with your wife."
She is not amused, but her husband pleads with her to do it by reminding her what they'll be getting in return. She eventually agrees, and goes off into the other room with him.
After they finish having sex, he rolls off of her, looks her in the eye, and says ...
"Isn't your husband a little old to be believing in genies?"