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Thread: Hot 4 Peyton, also Eli, but also Archie too

  1. -111
    Hot4Peyton's Avatar
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    i've had a powerful case of the green apple splatters for nigh going on 2 weeks now. the bouts of incontinence have become so frequent and intense, that i just started porky piggin it around the trailer -- that's where you wear a top but no bottoms? i was ruining just about every pair of bloomers i wore, so i just up and stopped wearin em altogether!. well, i was spendin so much time in the bathroom, that i decided to to keep my tv in there permenent like so as to not miss my progrims? this lead to a very unadvantageous accident however. ya see, on account of my front-butt, i have to "AC Slater" it everytime i use the terlet -- that's when ya sit on the terlet facing the wall. well the other night, the splatters came on real powerful like, and i rushed to sit down on the terlet without positioning my flesh folds proper like? well, a torrent of excrement kinda shotgunned outta my hindquarters and spackled my beloved tv screen! now it's all crusted over with my internal stink, and my shamwows and oxyclean won't get it off! im a might perplexed as to what to do. in the mean time, i cobbled together afew adult diapers so theyd fit over my girth. at least this way i won't befoul anymore of my possessions by usin the pesky terlet!
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  2. -112
    X-Pacolypse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hot4Peyton View Post
    i've had a powerful case of the green apple splatters for nigh going on 2 weeks now. the bouts of incontinence have become so frequent and intense, that i just started porky piggin it around the trailer -- that's where you wear a top but no bottoms? i was ruining just about every pair of bloomers i wore, so i just up and stopped wearin em altogether!. well, i was spendin so much time in the bathroom, that i decided to to keep my tv in there permenent like so as to not miss my progrims? this lead to a very unadvantageous accident however. ya see, on account of my front-butt, i have to "AC Slater" it everytime i use the terlet -- that's when ya sit on the terlet facing the wall. well the other night, the splatters came on real powerful like, and i rushed to sit down on the terlet without positioning my flesh folds proper like? well, a torrent of excrement kinda shotgunned outta my hindquarters and spackled my beloved tv screen! now it's all crusted over with my internal stink, and my shamwows and oxyclean won't get it off! im a might perplexed as to what to do. in the mean time, i cobbled together afew adult diapers so theyd fit over my girth. at least this way i won't befoul anymore of my possessions by usin the pesky terlet!
    "AC Slater" it? Never heard of that until now. My, my, my Humongous. Such an interesting life you lead.
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  3. -113
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    So, Humongous ...

    What's on the menu today for thanksgivin' - any special treats from the bog?
    2014 Goals:
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  4. -114
    Hot4Peyton's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bumpus View Post
    So, Humongous ...

    What's on the menu today for thanksgivin' - any special treats from the bog?
    well, i cooked up my famous boiled eel and owl pellet casserole this thanksgiving. the neighbors always complain to sheriff jergensens about the putrid aromas that acompany the cooking process? but this year they was outta town, so i guess that was a blessin.l thanksgiving is always a bitter sweet time for me. daddy always called it "Thanks fer Nuthin - Giving", and usually would drink a bottle or two of Windex, then go and throw handfuls a his own feces at native americans. daddy was always miscombobulatin things, he shouldn't have been throwin his feces at injuns, he shoulda been throwin them at pilgrums! daddy got real cloudy on History after about half a bottle a Windex. i invited dr. tittleman over fer dinner this year, but he got in trouble again fer takin photos of peoples bare feet down at the footlocker without they permission.
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  5. -115
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hot4Peyton View Post
    well, i cooked up my famous boiled eel and owl pellet casserole this thanksgiving. the neighbors always complain to sheriff jergensens about the putrid aromas that acompany the cooking process? but this year they was outta town, so i guess that was a blessin.l thanksgiving is always a bitter sweet time for me. daddy always called it "Thanks fer Nuthin - Giving", and usually would drink a bottle or two of Windex, then go and throw handfuls a his own feces at native americans. daddy was always miscombobulatin things, he shouldn't have been throwin his feces at injuns, he shoulda been throwin them at pilgrums! daddy got real cloudy on History after about half a bottle a Windex. i invited dr. tittleman over fer dinner this year, but he got in trouble again fer takin photos of peoples bare feet down at the footlocker without they permission.
    Owl Pellet Casserole. I can't say that I've ever had that. I did have broccoli casserole, though. I didn't realize Dr. Tittleman had a foot fetish.
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  6. -116
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hot4Peyton View Post
    well, i cooked up my famous boiled eel and owl pellet casserole this thanksgiving. the neighbors always complain to sheriff jergensens about the putrid aromas that acompany the cooking process? but this year they was outta town, so i guess that was a blessin.l thanksgiving is always a bitter sweet time for me. daddy always called it "Thanks fer Nuthin - Giving", and usually would drink a bottle or two of Windex, then go and throw handfuls a his own feces at native americans. daddy was always miscombobulatin things, he shouldn't have been throwin his feces at injuns, he shoulda been throwin them at pilgrums! daddy got real cloudy on History after about half a bottle a Windex. i invited dr. tittleman over fer dinner this year, but he got in trouble again fer takin photos of peoples bare feet down at the footlocker without they permission.
    Dear Humongous,

    I would appreciate it if you did not discuss my pending legal dispute with the patrons of Footlocker Incorporated, and the executive management of said corporation. Since I am no longer licensed to practice Podiatry, I sometimes must employ unorthodox methods to continue my incredibly important research. These methods may include obtaining a part time job as a sneaker salesman at an athletic footwear outlet, and photographically documenting the many varieties of feet with a hidden camera. I assure you that while ascertaining the shoe sizes of potential research subjects, in no way did I "fondle" their feet, nor did I "drool" while lacing up their new shoes. If my precious research made costumers of The Footlocker Corporation uncomfortable, or "creeped out and violated" as they put it, that is THEIR problem, not mine! My early and unwarranted termination from Footlocker Incorporated was an egregious mistake, and a profoundly giant leap backwards in my research, that is only harming the foot health of Mankind!

    On another note, Humongous, I am sorry I missed out on your delicious Boiled Eel and Owl Pellet Casserole. It has always been a Thanksgiving favorite of mine. It is a dish that is truly worth the crippling and painful diarrhea that is always sure to immediately follow its consumption.
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  7. -117
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    Quote Originally Posted by Dr. Tittleman View Post
    Dear Humongous,

    I would appreciate it if you did not discuss my pending legal dispute with the patrons of Footlocker Incorporated, and the executive management of said corporation. Since I am no longer licensed to practice Podiatry, I sometimes must employ unorthodox methods to continue my incredibly important research. These methods may include obtaining a part time job as a sneaker salesman at an athletic footwear outlet, and photographically documenting the many varieties of feet with a hidden camera. I assure you that while ascertaining the shoe sizes of potential research subjects, in no way did I "fondle" their feet, nor did I "drool" while lacing up their new shoes. If my precious research made costumers of The Footlocker Corporation uncomfortable, or "creeped out and violated" as they put it, that is THEIR problem, not mine! My early and unwarranted termination from Footlocker Incorporated was an egregious mistake, and a profoundly giant leap backwards in my research, that is only harming the foot health of Mankind!

    On another note, Humongous, I am sorry I missed out on your delicious Boiled Eel and Owl Pellet Casserole. It has always been a Thanksgiving favorite of mine. It is a dish that is truly worth the crippling and painful diarrhea that is always sure to immediately follow its consumption.
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  8. -118
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    Damn Humongous thats sounds like one dadgum tasty meal you had there on the holidays. A feast fit for a king, and certainly for a quarterback in a blue and white jersey with a number 18 on it. They say the way to a mans heart is through his stomach, So maybe you should freeze some of them thar vittles and Fed Ex to your beau TV dinner style. I suspect he would come a running lickety split for a chance at seconds of them thar mouth watering delicacies.

    Just win Phin baby!
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  9. -119
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    Quote Originally Posted by DphinBillkiller View Post
    Damn Humongous thats sounds like one dadgum tasty meal you had there on the holidays. A feast fit for a king, and certainly for a quarterback in a blue and white jersey with a number 18 on it. They say the way to a mans heart is through his stomach, So maybe you should freeze some of them thar vittles and Fed Ex to your beau TV dinner style. I suspect he would come a running lickety split for a chance at seconds of them thar mouth watering delicacies.
    Who's to say she already hasn't?
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  10. -120
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    You raise a good point there (X)!

    A bright girl like Humongous and that Tittles fella may have done occurred with that there idea.

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