“Turns out, far too much has been written about great men and not nearly enough about morons. Doesn't seem right.”
This gem was waiting in my inbox when I got to work this morning:
The safety of our associates is of utmost importance to us. This year the nesting geese seem to be even more aggressive than in the past. To protect our associates from potential injury directly by the geese or in trying to evade them, we have decided that we will have to remove and destroy the nests. We have acquired all the necessary approvals and will follow all the guidelines to ensure no harm will come to the geese, however, unfortunately, those regulations do not allow for relocation of the eggs. Once the nests are removed we will replace the mulch with a less attractive nesting material for the geese to deter them from future nest building. Thanks for understanding and supporting the need to protect all our associates and guest at Blankenbaker.
Hey, shady baby, I'm hot like the prodigal son
Pick a petal eenie meenie miney moe
And, flower, you're the chosen one
Well, your left hand's free
And your right's in a grip
With another left hand
Watch his right hand slip
Towards his gun, oh, no
I don't know what more this board wants.
Why, I can smile, and murder while I smile,
And cry 'Content' to that which grieves my heart,
And wet my cheeks with artificial tears,
And frame my face to all occasions.
I can add colours to the chameleon,
Change shapes with Proteus for advantages,
And set the murderous Machiavel to school.
Can I do this, and cannot get a crown?